‘An unidentified naked white man wearing a gas mask and standing outside was reported by two witnesses Thursday around 9:40 p.m. According to police, officers were called to 505 Centre St. for a report of a naked white man wearing a gas mask attempting to get into an apartment building.
A witness said that while driving on Centre Street, they saw a naked white man, approximately 30-years-old, around 6-feet-tall, weighing about 200 lbs., wearing a gas mask and standing in the common entrance of a building. The witness pulled his truck up and the man fled down an alleyway.
Another witness stated her doorbell rang and when she looked through the viewing hole of her front door, she also saw a white man with no clothes on wearing a gas mask. She told police she had no idea who the man was and did not open the door to her apartment.’
‘A karate club team have been crowned the world’s first gravy wrestling champions.
The eight teams competing for the title slopped about in a converted swimming pool filled with lukewarm gravy as part of the inaugural World Gravy-Wrestling Championships. [..]
Winning team leader Ian Marsden said: “It took great skill just to keep your feet. The gravy soon got cold and started to solidify.
“I think we got the better of the opposition because they were reduced to throwing lumpy gravy at us.”‘
‘She waited on her porch for a car made of bones to come and take her to hell.
Instead, when sheriff’s deputies arrived, she calmly went to jail, expecting the floor there to open up and deliver her to her fiery fate.
Were Jennifer Kukla’s visions, as described to police and psychiatrists, fantasies fueled by psychotic delusions? Or were they proof she knew right from wrong when she slit the throats of her two young daughters?’
‘In the last 15 years, the average bust size has increased from 34B to 36C. Whether the lift is due to breast augmentation surgeries or a side-effect of expanding waistlines is not known.
Either way, from slinky to full-coverage undergarments, bras have graced the bodies of women since the 1800s. But modern bra sizing didn’t come into fashion until 1928. [..]
Bras must support a pair of breasts that can weigh just over a half pound (0.3 kilograms) to a whopping 20 pounds (9 kilograms).’
I wonder what the caterpillar spit is for.
‘A police operation to covertly follow a Central Otago man came to an abrupt halt this week when the man found tracking devices planted in his car, ripped them out and listed them for sale on Trade Me. [..]
Williams said a cellphone sim card in one of the devices appeared to transmit messages to the mobile phone of Detective Sergeant Derek Shaw, of the Central Otago CIB.
Williams provided The Press with emails from Shaw saying: “If you have got something of ours it would be good to get it back. You can call me and I can come meet you.” [..]
Williams said he did not know why police were interested in him. He spent two years in jail “20 years ago” for selling marijuana to an undercover policeman, but had no convictions since then.
Williams said the devices were not hard to find and he described the operation as “a bumbling attempt” by “weirdos”.’
‘A Noble boy’s parents were pleased charges were filed over their son being killed by a police bullet intended for a snake. But the charges don’t ease the pain of their loss, they said. [..]
Officer Paul Bradley Rogers, 34, and Sgt. Robert Shawn Richardson, 29, are accused of causing the death of Austin Haley, 5, by negligently firing at a snake. A bullet ricocheted and hit the child while he was outside fishing with his grandfather, investigators said.
Rogers, an officer in training, fired the shot that killed Austin. Rogers only had been on the Noble police force about a month, District Attorney Greg Mashburn said Friday. Richardson, Rogers’ supervisor, gave the order to shoot, officials said.
Mashburn said the decision to charge the officers is one of the most difficult he’s made.
“I conclude that these officers failed to do something that a reasonably careful person would do by firing a weapon at a nonpoisonous snake that was stuck in a birdhouse without knowing what laid behind their location,” he said.’
‘A 30-year-old man is lucky to be alive after he and his wife were assaulted by up to six occupants of a Hummer vehicle as they stood admiring it in inner-Melbourne early today.
Police said the man and his 32-year-old wife were admiring a silver-coloured Hummer – a large, US-style four-wheel drive – outside Kings car park on Flinders Lane, between Spencer and King streets, about 5.30am (AEST) when they were set upon.
The man said “I love your car” before he was attacked by up to six people, with at least one brandishing a metal bar.
“The victim was severely beaten and left unconscious,” Detective Senior Constable Brett Hampson said.
He was taken to the Royal Melbourne Hospital with sever head injuries and blood loss.’
Exactly what the title says. I could write something more, but really, what is there to write?
‘This adorably cute little baby switches from really happy to bawling in an instant.’
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see it here »
‘Three boys have been reported to the Children’s Panel after an explosion and major fire at a chemical plant in Ayrshire, police have said.
Flames were spotted at the Nobel Enterprises factory in Stevenston at about 2000 BST on Saturday.
The fire involved highly-flammable nitrocellulose, which is used in inks and coatings. [..]
Anne Graham, also 56, said: “It was terrible. I thought the sun had come out, then my husband phoned and said ‘Do you see?’
“I couldn’t believe it. I stood on a nearby hill and could feel the heat on my face.” [..]
Strathclyde Police said about 1,500 to 1,700 tons of the nitrocellulose had been involved in the incident.’
‘The body of a stillborn baby was put in a supermarket carrier bag after it was delivered and left with the parents for two hours as they waited at hospital. [..]
The body was put in a bag when an ambulance took her to the Royal Sussex County Hospital. She said it stayed in the bag while she waited in A&E. [..]
She said she had to wait in a room in A&E for two hours without being examined, and that during that time her baby was in a plastic bag on top of a cabinet in the room with her and her husband, Michael.
She also said that when she was moved to another ward, the bag was placed on a windowsill.’
‘A man described in court as a “major alcoholic” has been banned from every pub in England and Wales for two years following an attack in a Devon bar.
Jon McGoff, 35, drank a litre of vodka before punching Dave Gover’s face and biting him, Exeter Crown Court heard. [..]
The prosecutor said; “When McGoff interrupted the landlady of the Kings Arms as she was serving drinks, Mr Gover went over to see what the problem was.”
He was then “punched in the face and knocked to the ground and McGoff took another swing at him then sunk his teeth into his arm causing five puncture wounds,” the prosecutor added.’
‘A bald man went into a pharmacy and stole five bottles of a hair loss treatment but was caught while running away, police said. Mark Hoousendove, 42, was arrested on misdemeanor charges of petty larceny and resisting arrest, Detective Lt. William Sullivan said. The product was worth about $50.
Hoousendove, of Freeport, had just dropped off friends who were visiting an inmate at Sing Sing prison on Sunday when he went into the pharmacy, police said. An officer nearby chased him and grabbed him, they said.’
‘Eighties television icon MacGyver has beaten Indiana Jones, James Bond and Jack Bauer as the fictional hero most Americans would want by their side in the event of a disaster.
In the survey, commissioned by the McCormick Tribune Foundation, participants were given a choice among seven fictional heroes for help in an emergency.
Twenty seven per cent of respondents said they would want MacGyver to help them out should disaster strike.’
‘It sounds like a bad Jeff Foxworthy joke. A drunk, middle-aged man unloads his handgun in his backyard, hitting a passing truck, and then tries to punch a cop in the balls after the law comes knocking. Only the suspect in this case isn’t your typical redneck. He’s Martin LeNoir, one of the top defense attorneys in Dallas.
On Labor Day at around 4:40 p.m., Bob Kennedy was driving his truck on Sperry Street in Lakewood when his driver’s side window shattered. The glass fell on his lap. He heard a gunshot and feared someone was shooting at him. [..]
When they were let into the backyard, the officers immediately saw evidence that incriminated the suspect. (The police report doesn’t specify what it was they found.) According to the report, the “suspect,” whom police won’t name because they say he hasn’t yet been charged, became belligerent and attempted to punch an officer in the groin.’
‘A Fayetteville man was charged Sunday with having sex with one of his boss’ dogs. [..]
A neighbor told authorities she saw Johnson assaulting one of two adult female pit bulls the morning of Aug. 21 in his front yard, said Animal Control Officer Frank Ringleberg.
Johnson was living in a mobile home on Autumn Drive in Vass before he moved to Fayetteville, Ringleberg said. The owners of Presidential Tree Service, the company where Johnson works, let their employees live in the mobile home, Ringleberg said.
Both dogs were taken to a veterinarian for examination, Detective Bill Mackey said. One of the dogs had minor injuries, but the veterinarian could not determine how the injuries were made, Mackey said.’
It would make for an interesting tactic during salary negotiations. ‘Give me a raise or I’ll fuck your dog!’.. :)
‘An Invercargill man who urinates on his veggie garden stands by his practice.
Nick Kiddey told The Southland Times this week that he urinates on his vegetable plants as it was an excellent fertiliser, which was sterile and contains no pathogens.
It was also a great way to conserve water instead of flushing the toilet which wastes up to 11 litres of clean water per flush, Mr Kiddey said.
However, a caller to The Southland Times disagreed with Mr Kiddey’s comments about urine containing no pathogens and wanted to know what evidence there was to support it.
Mr Kiddey responded, stating that on further research into the issue he agreed urine “may contain” pathogens.’
‘These firemen rig a contraption that lets them lift a car up in the air using water pressure from multiple hoses. I guess this is what they do when there arent any fires going on, where do I sign up?’
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‘A woman was arrested and charged with arson and burglary after police say she set fire to the home of a neighbor she thought had stolen her keys.
Sgt. Clint Riley of the Lane County Sheriff’s Office said the 23-year-old woman later found her keys hanging from her pants pocket. [..]
She called 9-1-1 and hid in a bush across the street while deputies and firefighters responded, Riley said.
The woman’s boyfriend said a friend called him at work and he rushed home to find her hiding in the bushes, barefoot and incoherent, according to the report.
The woman told her boyfriend her keys were missing, at which time he pointed to a set of keys hanging from her pants pocket and “she began to cry,” Riley said.’
‘Doctors in China have discovered 26 sewing needles embedded in the body of a 31-year-old woman.
They think they were inserted into Luo Cuifen’s body when she was a baby by grandparents upset she was not a boy.
Some of these needles have penetrated vital organs, such as the lungs, liver and kidneys. One has even broken into three pieces in the woman’s brain.
The needles were discovered only when Ms Luo went to hospital complaining of blood in her urine.’
‘What else can inkjet technology be used for? Injecting drugs into humans, according to Hewlett-Packard.
The company is licensing a medical patch it has developed to Ireland’s Crospon that potentially can replace hypodermic needles or pills for delivering vaccines or other types of medication to patients. The patch contains up to 90,000 microneedles per square inch, microprocessors and a thermal unit.
Medications contained in the patch are heated and then injected through the needles. Processors can monitor drug delivery, deliver doses over extended periods of time or deliver drugs in response to a patient’s vital signs (e.g., blood pressure or heart rate), depending on how it is programmed.’
‘US scientists may have uncovered a genetic reason why lonely people may have poorer health.
The UCLA research, published in Genome Biology, found certain genes were more active in people who reported feelings of social isolation.
Many of the genes identified have links to the immune system and tissue inflammation – which may be damaging.
Other studies have shown clear links between lack of social support and illnesses such as heart disease.
The researchers said that quality, not quantity, of friendships, appeared to be important.’
‘A biker crashes directly into a tree and needs to be helicoptered to a hospital where he stayed for 3 months. That looked painful.’
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see it here »
‘Two men have been arrested for stealing a man’s clothes and leaving him to wander around naked, officials said. The victim, a 19-year-old Hazleton man, was taken by two men to a rural area west of Oelwein where the men took his clothes at gunpoint, officials with the Fayette County sheriff’s office said.
The investigation began after the sheriff’s office received a report of a naked man walking down a county road early Sunday morning.
Deputies searched an Oelwein home later in the day and found the victim’s clothes and several guns.’
‘Police say a burglar has stolen narcotics from three pharmacies by walking in during business hours, climbing into the space above the ceiling and hiding there until the store closes. [..]
In the first two instances, Denver Police say the suspect hid in a false ceiling inside a bathroom. Police say he also hid in a false ceiling in the most recent incident. Police say the man is extremely patient, in some cases hiding up to eight hours. They also say he seems to be pretty knowledgeable about prescription drugs as he picks and chooses what he steals.
Police say the burglar has not been violent so far, but that could change.’
‘Lick me in the ass!
Let us be glad!
Grumbling is in vain!
Growling, droning is in vain,
is the true bane of life,
Droning is in vain,
Growling, droning is in vain, in vain!
Thus let us be cheerful and merry, be glad!’
‘A Chinese man due to be deported to face serious criminal charges at home is in a Sydney hospital after swallowing razor blades.
The man, known as Mr Qi, has been held in detention since his visa was revoked in February 2004, when Chinese authorities issued a warrant for his arrest.
He had been due to be deported to China today to face charges of kidnap and murder, after the Federal Government was given an undertaking from Beijing that he would not face the death penalty if convicted. [..]
“He would rather die here than go back,” Mr Rintoul said.’
