‘The International Ginger Kids Foundation, or IGKF ,is a not-for-profit organization founded in 2002. The goal of the IGKF is to achieve equality, understanding, tolerance, and acceptance for Ginger Kids all over the world. Gingervitis is a serious disease affecting millions of people. Every day 1337 children are born with gingervitis in the United States alone. Not only do these special people have to struggle with a life long disease in which there is no known cure, they are often the target of ridicule and jokes. The only way we will ever find a cure is if we work together.’
bkr H gUPbq WUk zRoU‘Observe, if you will, the milk jug in question. Good to know our favourite eBay seller isn’t lactose intolerant — and really, milk and pizza go well together. Besides, why not have more bacteria protection on the *other* side of the G4?
I was completely overwhelmed by the situation. How on God’s green earth could anyone think that I’d do the Mypos Dance of Joy over the arrival of a computer, packed with someone’s garbage?’
How far do you think a car would fly if you stuck a couple of rockets on the back of it and launched it from a ramp?
Fair enough, I reckon. :)
(5.5meg Windows media)
see it here »
‘”My, that’s an impressive weapon – it puts me in mind of your penis. Would you care for sexual intercourse?”
Due to budget cutbacks, the writers of the Carry On series were forced to pare their jokes down to single entendres. Carry On Up My Arse was a commercial and critical failure.’
FxVIq dZrHeI‘Every guy has been in a position where he is asked a question and he doesn’t respond completely honestly. What if guys stopped lying and started saying what they were really thinking?’
(8.5meg Windows media)
see it here »
‘Ricky Lackey has six children on the way.
Don’t call them sextuplets – they’re each with different women.
When Hamilton County Common Pleas Judge Melba Marsh asked Lackey during sentencing Friday on a charge of attempted theft how many children he had, the 25-year-old said, “None, but I have six on the way.”
A stunned Marsh tried to clarify. “Are you marrying a woman with six children?” she asked.
“No, I be concubining,” he said. [..]
Marsh said she wasn’t sure how to respond, so she let the issue drop since it wasn’t relevant to the proceedings.’
‘You run into a shop and tell everyone to hit the floor. For every muppet that hits the deck, you get a point. Simple.’
(7.1meg Windows media)
see it here »
This turkey doesn’t like policemen.
(6.5meg Windows media)
see it here »
‘The Christian Democrat leader, Fred Nile, wants random drug testing for all NSW MPs.
He will be first to volunteer, and wants the Greens MP Lee Rhiannon to be second.
Unaccountably, in 2004 Mr Nile voted for an amendment watering down Rhiannon’s motion to breath-test MPs for alcohol while in Parliament.
Yesterday Mr Nile was tough on drugs in Macquarie Street: “The voting public deserve to know whether the people they elect are capable of making rational decisions and are prepared to devote themselves to the job. There is no room for illegal drug taking in a House of Parliament.”‘
Yet another clip of The Annoying Devil from Balls of Steel.
This one isn’t the best, but it’s not bad. :)
(26.4meg Windows media)
see it here »
Here’s how you do the wooden spoon trick if you only have two spoons instead of three. :)
(1.9meg Windows media)
see it here »
‘A man told police not to blame him for crashing his truck into a light post it was that unicorn behind the wheel. Prosecutor Ingrid Rosenquist said Phillip C. Holliday Jr. initially denied driving the truck involved in the March 7 crash in Billings. He told officers at the scene that a unicorn was driving, she said.
Holliday, 42, pleaded not guilty Tuesday to felony charges of criminal endangerment and drunken driving.’
‘Tracy Morgan of Saturday Night Live and 30 Rock is interviewed on morning television by Robert Holguin of KVIA. The live interview goes wildly out of control when the whacked out comedian takes off his shirt.’
(7.8meg Flash video)
see it here »
‘Sometimes the phone rings… and it’s a wrong number.
Very rarely… that call is in a language you can’t understand.
But if it was… you’d never pretend to speak their langauge…
Would you?’
(4.6meg Windows media)
see it here »
‘A 3-foot black snake sent reporters scurrying in the press box as the the New York Mets defeated the Cleveland Indians 6-5 in a spring training game on Tuesday.
As the snake slithered across notebooks and laptop computers in the bottom of the fourth inning, fans stood up and laughed as they gazed into the press area.’
‘Maya leaders are to perform a special cleaning ceremony at ancient ruins to clear bad energy after a visit by President Bush.
Mr Bush is due at the Mayan ruins of Iximche in Guatemala as part of his tour of the Latin American region, reports the BBC.
But after he leaves, Maya protesters said they would hold a ceremony to restore peace and harmony to the area.
Morales Toj said: “We will burn incense, place flowers and water in the area where Mr Bush has walked to clean out the bad energy.”
Indigenous leader Rodolfo Pocop complained: “No, Mr Bush, you cannot trample and degrade the memory of our ancestors. This is not your ranch in Texas.”‘
The snowmobile is powerful enough to cross a small river.
There are somethings you can’t drive through tho. :)
(1.7meg Windows media)
see it here »
‘Me: “Hi, I’m calling on behalf of Smithtown Lincoln Mercury may I…”
IQ=10: “Is this a recording?!”
Me: “No, I am not a recording, Sir. May I please speak to…”
IQ=2: “I DON’T BELIEVE YOU!!”
IQ=2 *Click*’
Also: Retarded Customer Questions, Part II
‘When I was about 11, my little brother (8 at the time) sleepwalked into my bedroom in the middle of the night. He started banging on my dresser with his hand and saying “MOM SAID TO PUT IT RIGHT HERE! MOM SAID TO PUT IT RIIIIGHT HEEERE!!”.
He then turned around and walked slightly out of the room. The next thing out of his mouth was:
“FUCKING MIDGETS!”
Then he got in the shower fully pajama’ed, turned it on, showered briefly, got out, and went back to bed. All without waking. [..]
In basic training, one guy was heard almost screaming, “WE MUST TURN THIS BED INTO A FORT” [..]
A mate also said this in his sleep to his lady friend.
“Just because I’ve got a shitty finger, doesn’t make me a bad man.”‘
XGqmEJa YRPZmwm CnT fblc‘Some teens fashioned a small car to drive backwards and sideways. They take it on the street and go wild. Very entertaining.’
(9.9meg Windows media)
see it here »
‘These guys dare their friend to climb into the dryer all the way and close the door. Turning the dryer on was not part of the deal and when that happens, the prank back fires, painfully.’
(3.4meg Windows media)
see it here »
This lecturer reads back some of the feedback he’s gotten over the years. It’s pretty hilarious.
I should grow a moustache. :)
(6.2meg Windows media)
see it here »
‘Israel has recalled its ambassador to El Salvador after he was found drunk and naked apart from bondage gear.
Reports say he was able to identify himself to police only after a rubber ball had been removed from his mouth.
A foreign ministry official described Ambassador Tzuriel Refael’s behaviour as an unprecedented embarrassment.’
