moonbuggy

‘I will not accept that its a highly dangerous road..’

(943kB Windows media)

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`Who is going to care for your pets after you are raptured into heaven?

Many Christians believe that animals do not go to heaven. So when Jesus comes back and you return with him to heaven, will there be somebody to take care of your dog or cat? [..]

With the imminent collapse of the global economy and rampant godlessness, even the community shelters will not have the resources to care for your poor, hungry animals. So you need to make preparations.

That’s what JesusPets is for. We are assembling a community of heathen pet-lovers to care for pets that are “left-behind.” We are coordinating with feed mills and kennels in preparation for your post-apocalyptic pet care needs.’

‘Simple physics, for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. Thats why you dont hold the butt of a shotgun close to your face when shooting. The same is also true for less powerful objects like this potato gun launcher.’

(2.0meg Windows media)

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Looks like it hurt a bit. :)

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‘James Brown, the Godfather of Soul, was remembered this week as a music legend who instilled black pride, and also as a man who gave black men across the nation justification to beat their wives and girlfriends.

Mr. Brown died of congestive heart failure after taking a swing at his girlfriend, and missing. The uncontrolled motion of his arm, not having been slowed by its intended target, tore his left ventricle, according to his agent, Frank Copsidas.

Mr. Brown sold millions of records and slapped thousands of women in a career that lasted half a century, and his music provided the rhythms that are the basis of hip-hop and much of current pop. Mr. Copsidas said Mr. Brown was working up until the day he died, and said his slogan was: “I’m the hardest working man in show business, and I’ll slap anyone who says otherwise.”‘

‘The government of Dubai installed a rather large speed bump on a street that locals had developed a habit of traveling on at very high speeds. Only one minor problem, the government didn’t tell anyone it had installed the speed bump. Including a Lamborghini Gallardo.’

This might be a repost, but it’s pretty funny. :)

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‘Jeremy Clarkson, James May and Richard Hammond have a go at converting a Renault Espace into a convertable, then putting it through some tests.’

This is hilarious. :)

(40.1meg Flash video)

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‘That’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever seen! Patrick Stefan you should be embarrassed for what you just did. That does not belong in the National Hockey League!’

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‘Not because of this move.. or this one.. but this one..’

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Crazy bunny.

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‘During a New Years Eve concert this weekend some dude jumped on stage with the Rolling Stones and Keith Richards nails him with his guitar.’

(957kB Windows media)

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`Assuming you find the idea of some errant myspace numbnut faced with a gaping ass entertaining, then you will become first giggly, and then fall aside laughing to know that within an hour I had “goatse’d” 400 people.

Within two days it was 25,000. Twenty five thousand.

We are now up to nearly a hundred thousand viewings of this file in its new ass-o-rama version. I am sure that through libraries, schools, colleges, cubicles, offices, warehouses, the sound of someone’s throat reflexively making a sound not unlike “Uuuuaaaaaghhhghh” has filled the air. The amount of time lost in horrified stares and frantic jabs at the keyboard and mouse to get away, far away must be into the realm of hours by now. Maybe days! Days of slack-jawed horrified faces staring into a big square eyeball. I don’t know, that gets a chortle out of me. I’m easily entertained.’

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Acronyms are funny. :)

More here: Citizens United Negating Technology

‘I just happened to be standing in the line of fire, when my mother hit my uncles arm with the wiimote, which then caused her to throw the wiimote at mii as I was filming.’

(1.8meg Flash video)

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`A Lithuanian held on suspicion of theft in an Arctic Norway jail slipped out of custody – literally – by stripping naked, smearing himself with vegetable oil and sliding through the prison bars, police said Wednesday.

“He slipped through the bars on Christmas Eve,” said Svein-Erik Jacobsen, operation leader for the Oest-Finnmark Police District. The unusual escape made national news in Norway on Wednesday.

Another Lithuanian, held as an accomplice in the same cell, also used the technique to try to slip out of a window of the Vadsoe Jail, but failed, apparently because he was too big. The men had managed to bend the bars slightly to gain more space.’

`Happy New Year, ladies and gents! I’m sure you’re all still full of the optimism and good cheer that only the blank slate of a new year can bring. This week’s Comedy Goldmine, which features Forums Goon DARNTOOTINHOSS’s idea MSpaint images created by the stupid things we all did back when we were little, is sure to bolster that feel-good buzz we all hope will never wear off.’

`An overweight woman who got stuck in a South African cave trapped 22 fellow tourists for more than 10 hours and had to be prised free with liquid paraffin.

The woman became trapped in the Tunnel of Love obstacle in the Cango Caves in Western Cape on New Year’s Day.

The caves’ manager said the woman had been warned she might not be suitable but she insisted on trying. [..]

No drilling equipment was needed and the woman was eventually freed with a pulley and paraffin used to grease the surface at about 2320.’

‘In the 1960s, Dr. Peter Witt gave spiders various kinds of drugs and alcohol to observe the effects on their webs. The results were pretty interesting.’

(5.9meg Windows media)

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‘Guy came home to find his house broken into and naked guy sleeping on his couch.’

(5.3meg Windows media)

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‘Ali G interviews NBA stars and announcers ‘

(9.7meg Windows media)

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.. and sticking his finger up his arse whilst he’s doing it, by the looks of things.

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This is a pretty funny clip of a jump on a mini bike that goes slightly wrong.

(3.7meg Flash video)

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`Armed with my new tips and tricks, I laced up my skates and headed out to face the jungle that is childhood. When the boys confronted me again, I dared them to mess with me. One ballsy kid lunged towards me with the intent of pushing me down. Quickly, I kicked that kid squarely between the legs with my skate. He crumpled to the ground as I hysterically screamed at his friends, “I’LL EAT YOUR EYES! I’LL EAT ALL OF YOUR EYES!” Terrified, those boys got up and ran like Hell. I’ve never felt so empowered in my entire life.’

`A new poll from The Associated Press and AOL News has discovered that Americans are torn in terms of their perception of President George W. Bush and his performance in 2006. When asked to name the past year’s biggest villain, Bush was far and away the #1 choice, commanding 25% of the vote, distantly trailed by Osama Bin Laden (8%), Saddam Hussein (6%), President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad of Iran (5%), North Korean leader Kim Jong II (2%) and Donald Rumsfeld (2%). Satan only took in 1% of the vote, as did Hugo Chavez, Tom Cruise, Dick Cheney, Hillary Clinton, John Kerry and Rosie O’Donnell, among others.

On the flipside, Bush also claimed the top spot when Americans were asked to name the year’s biggest hero, but with only a trifling 13% of the vote. [..]

There’s some video over at Crooks and Liars.

`Jay Mohr exchanged wedding vows with “Las Vegas” actress Nikki Cox in a ceremony here, People magazine reported.

The couple was married Friday night, according to the magazine.’

`The Darwin Awards salute the improvement of the human genome by honoring those who, uh, remove themselves from it…

Like two people, 17 and 20, who imitated Darth Vader and made light sabres from fluorescent light tubes. That’s right, they opened up fluoresceent tubes, poured gasoline inside, and lit the end… As one can imagine, a Star Wars sized explosion was not far behind. One died, the other survived to ‘fess up to their creative, but stupid, reenactment.’