`An escaped chimpanzee at the Little Rock Zoo raided a kitchen cupboard and did a little cleaning with a toilet brush before sedatives knocked her out on top of a refrigerator. [..]
Keeper Ann Rademacher says Judy went into the bathroom, picked up a toilet brush and cleaned the toilet. Rademacher says the 37-year-old Judy was a house pet before the zoo acquired her in 1988, so she may have been familiar with housekeeping chores. Judy wrung out a sponge and scrubbed down the fridge.
It took a couple of tries, but the zoo sedated the chimp, who fell asleep on top of the refrigerator with half a loaf of cinnamon-raisin bread she had pulled out of the freezer.’
‘This dude drinks an entire bottle of Vodka in just 20 seconds. The effects take about an hour or so but he finally passes out in a classroom taking notes.’
(5.7meg Windows media)
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`A woman from Devon who finally passed her driving test after 23 years is now hoping to use her wealth of experience to help others.
Maria McCarthy from Sidmouth ripped up her L-plates after taking about 250 lessons, which cost her between £2,000 and £3,000.
The 42-year-old said getting her licence has given her a “badge of adulthood” and changed her life.
She has now written a book aimed at helping other women succeed.’
This is what happens when you laptop batteries overheat or get damaged.
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`A California radio station has fired 10 employees, including five on-air personalities, after Jennifer Strange, a mother of three, died following her participation in a “Hold Your Wee for a Wii” competition, reports the Sacramento Bee. The 28-year-old died of water intoxication, having consumed an estimated two gallons of water in an attempt to win a Nintendo console for her children. The winner of the contest was to be the person who managed to drink the most water without going to the bathroom.
Strange called into her office after the show and told a coworker that she had a “really bad” headache and would be going straight home. She was found dead in her Rancho Cordova home on Friday afternoon by her mother, who had gone to check on her after being contacted by the concerned coworker.’
`Angry homeowners called on the police yesterday to stop a house on their “lovely” estate being used to make porn films.
They claim adult filmmaker James Edwards has shot sex movies in full view of his neighbours.
They say women have exposed themselves on the drive of his £400,000 house in Bradley Stoke, Bristol.
One was fined £80 for urinating in the front garden while being filmed. [..]
He also warned he plans to feature the street in a TV porn series. “Using special effects, I’ll show actors having sex in front of neighbours’ homes.”‘
`Doctors’ unions in Romania have criticised a decision to make a surgeon pay £100,000 in damages after he lost his temper and hacked off a patient’s penis during surgery.
Surgeon Naum Ciomu, who had been suffering from stress at the time, had been operating on patient Nelu Radonescu, 36, to correct a testicular malformation when he suddenly lost his temper.
Grabbing a scalpel, he sliced off the penis in front of shocked nursing staff, and then placed it on the operating table where he chopped it into small pieces before storming out of the operating theatre at Bucharest hospital. ‘
The trick is getting over the lip. :)
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`A criminal defense lawyer was arrested after a sheriff’s deputy found him naked with a 14-year-old girl in a courthouse conference room, authorities said Tuesday.
The deputy looked into the room during rounds Monday afternoon and discovered 49-year-old Larry Charles and the girl, said Lt. Dan Bagnell of the police department’s Special Victims Unit.
“He had asked for sex. But there was no physical contact we’re aware of,” Bagnell said. ‘
This is a giant flying-fox that crosses some valley. Would be a lot of fun. :)
(3.6meg Windows media)
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`Police are looking for suspects in the apparent sexual assault of a pit bull puppy in Newark.
The Associated Humane Societies of Newark was notified at 7 a.m. Tuesday by the Newark Police Department that a pit bull puppy had been sodomized by a local resident. An ambulance was dispatched to 321 Seth Boyden Terrace in Newark to rescue the injured animal.
“She was so cold to the touch, she’s in shock. She’s bleeding internally, and she couldn’t even get up,” Debbie Beyfuss of AHS told 1010 WINS. “We’re all sick over this.” ‘
`Your 14-year-old daughter shows up on MySpace in a bikini. Her 13-year-old friend is wearing a miniskirt that might make Britney Spears blush. Time to panic? Not necessarily.
Wearing short-shorts and belly shirts, grinding to hip-hop hits, and posting provocative pictures of themselves on the Internet – the behavior of many teen and tween girls has parents wondering if their daughters are bound for a lifetime of promiscuity and loose morals.
But some psychologists and child-development specialists believe nothing about the teenage drama has really changed. While young women may express their sexuality more overtly than they have in the past, for the most part, their behavior isn’t cause for alarm. It’s a necessary step in growing up.’
`Since Bulgaria joined the European Union, sales of Boza Ale, which claims to give women bigger breasts, has skyrocketed.
European men have been purchasing the beer, made from yeast and fermented flour, for European women since the extra taxes were removed with EU participation, Britain’s the Sun reported Monday.
Bar owners and shopkeepers are also stocking up, the report said.’
That’s pretty fucked up. Almost like it’s from a zombie movie. Except it’s not zombies, it’s rabies.
see it here »
`A 46-year-old German motorist driving along a busy road suddenly veered to the left and ended up stuck on a railway track – because his satellite navigation system told him to, police said.
The motorist was heading into the north German city of Bremen “when the friendly voice from his satnav told him to turn left”, a spokesman said.
“He did what he was ordered to do and turned his Audi left up over the curb and onto the track of a local streetcar line. He tried to back up off the track but got completely stuck.”
The police spokesman said about a dozen trams were held up until a tow truck arrived to clear the car off the track.
Several German motorists have crashed their cars in recent months, later telling police they were only obeying orders from their satnavs.’
If embedded Flash video doesn’t seem to play properly, try the embedded Windows media file on the other side of the link.
(793kB Windows media)
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`New research by the University of Warwick reveals that a Nobel Prize brings more than just cash and kudos – it can also add nearly two years to your life.
The research by Professor Andrew Oswald, an economist at the University of Warwick, and Matthew Rablen, (a former Warwick postgraduate researcher now a government economist), is published this month in a study entitled “Mortality and Immortality”. [..]
Professor Oswald said: “Status seems to work a kind of health-giving magic. Once we do the statistical corrections, walking across that platform in Stockholm apparently adds about 2 years to a scientist’s life-span. How status does this, we just don’t know.”‘
This is the official “Account of the Accident”. It’s quite long but kinda interesting, if you like that sorta thing. :)
The full report is also available.
`Better-for-you snacking has come down to this: fresh fruit all but guaranteed to make kids belch.
It’s Fizzy Fruit – whole grapes or slices of apples or pineapples carbonated in a secret process with the same carbon dioxide that’s in soft drinks but without added sugar. [..]
Food scientist Steven Witherly predicts kids may like it so much that overall fruit consumption actually could rise. But Witherly, author of the upcoming book Why Humans Like Junk Food, warns, “The consumption of non-fizzed fruit may decrease.”
One nutritionist is concerned. “Will this get kids used to eating fruit in an unnatural form and deter them from eating it in a natural form?” asks Kelly Brownell, director of the Yale Center for Eating and Weight Disorders. “It’s sad that we’ve come to this state of affairs.”‘
This isn’t just some soccer player rolling around on the ground, crying and pretending to be hurt for a penalty. This is the exception that proves the rule.
[The rule being that soccer is a silly game played by bitches. :)]
see it here »
British Telecom uses the voice of Tom Baker aka Dr Who for the automated reading of SMS messages. This site has a compilation of lots of amusing sentences said by the synthetic Tom Baker. :)
`Controversial singer and animal rights campaigner Pink has backed down on her call for a boycott of Australian wool.
Pink made the statement as part of a video for PETA — People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals — calling for the end of mulesing. [..]
But Pink, who labelled the practice “sadistic”, said she had been misinformed. [..]
“My one mistake was saying to boycott the whole industry, all Australian wool.
“That’s absolutely not right. That’s not my stance. My stance is to boycott mulesing.”‘
‘Hawaii-based NRI comedian, Gautham Prasad has created a huge controversy in India, with his parody of Mahatma Gandhi. The 3 minute 24 second act, on Google’s video sharing site, YouTube, has resulted in angry protests across Ahmedabad , Bhubhaneshwar, Varanasi, with the vulgar portrayal of Gandhi.
The video, shot in the US, shows Prasad clad in Gandhi’s trademark attire, pole dancing and stripping for an audience. Records on YouTube show the video, called ‘Time to get sexy’ was uploaded a month ago.’
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`A mother surnamed Zhang who uses her body to teach her son sex education has sparked controversy in Wuhan, capital of Hubei Province. During a gynecological examination at the Wuhan Health Center for Women and Children last Thursday, Zhang brought her son into the examination room, letting him see her body and telling him how a woman becomes pregnant and delivers.
Zhang said she wanted to educate her son, a 14-year-old grade 2 junior middle school student, correctly. Others, including doctors, said she should use better teaching methods.’
‘Amazing footage of a soldier in Iraq who gets shot at by a sniper but the bullet is stopped by the glass in front of him.’
(763kB Windows media)
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This is some sort of art or some bizarre new fetish. Maybe both.
‘Amazing amateur video from a rooftop of the icy road conditions in Portland. The cars are slipping around like a pinball game. Probably the one day a year you can drive wasted and no one would notice.’
(7.9meg Windows media)
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`Chilean artist Marco Evaristti presented his friends with his newest creation on Thursday night: Meatballs cooked with fat from his own body, extracted by liposuction.
‘Ladies and gentleman, bon appetit and may God bless,’ said Evaristti, a glass in his hand, to his dining companions seated around a table at the Animal Gallery in Chile’s capital, Santiago.
On the plates in front of them was a serving of agnolotti pasta and in the middle, a meatball made with the fat that Evaristti had removed from his body last last year.
‘You are not a cannibal if you eat art,’ he added. He described it as a criticism of the plastic surgery market.’
Also, images of people eating the meatballs.
