moonbuggy

`An 85-year-old Canadian man spent hours inside his impounded car in freezing temperatures after his vehicle was ticketed for illegal parking and then towed to a police compound, police said on Thursday.

Police in the western city of Edmonton, Alberta, said frost had obscured the car’s windows and a tow-truck driver, unaware of the elderly man sitting in the driver’s seat, took the car to the police compound.’

`Have you got a coworker who stinks like ass?

A friend who really needs to take a bath?

An acquaintance you wish would learn about standard hygiene practices?

…but you don’t know how to bring it up?

YouHaveBO.com is for you.

We will send that stinky person in your life an anonymous and fun notification that he or she needs to change socks, put on some deodorant or take a shower.’

`Can anyone read this? Don’t worry if it doesn’t make sense. These are the English instructions for pumping gas. If you can read it, you might understand why it took us two tries and around $70 to obtain about 5 liters of diesel. Thank goodness for kind-hearted Italians, and the female travel companions that lure them.’

`Two window washers hold on for dear life as high winds smash their platform into a downtown Denver high rise.’

You don’t need to clean the windows after you’ve smashed them all. Good thinking. :)

(streaming video)

`This is a series of biographies on the personal lives of history’s mad royals. The absolute power they enjoyed often brought out the worst features of their character. Many Royals had egocentric, megalomaniac or paranoid tendencies and their mental states ranged from severe psychotic and psycho-organic disorders to personality disorders and light neuroses. Although not all Royals in this series were clinically mad, they certainly were peculiar.’

A cool little program that colourizes black and white photos in an interesting way.

`A former secretary of the U.S. Commission on Fine Arts has gotten a $5 ticket for jaywalking even though, at the time, he was lying critically injured in the street after being hit by a car.

Police told The Washington Post that Charles Atherton, 73, was conscious when he was issued the ticket before being taken to the hospital Thursday night.

But witnesses report that Atherton was unresponsive and struggling to breathe.’

`This page is maintained by Alistair B. Fraser in an attempt to sensitize teachers and students to examples of the bad science often taught in schools, universities, and offered in popular articles and even textbooks. [..]

When I created this page, in January, 1995, I naïvely expected that other frustrated teachers would rush to build sites devoted to, say, Bad Archeology and Bad Biology. It has not happened. Apparently, most teachers believe everything they teach. Sigh, one is reminded of Lily Tomlin when she said , “No matter how cynical you become, it’s never enough to keep up.”’

`Coming in telephoto, wide and macro varieties, these lenses—which you crudely attach with a magnet—ensure that you will make the very most out of that, ooh, 1 megapixel your phone camera is capable of shooting.

All this pointless novelty doesn’t come cheap either—at 7000-yen (approx. $57) each you would expect Ansel Adams-like results. But I believe that all you’ll elicit is a lot of people saying “hey, what the hell is that on your phone?” to your chagrin and shame.’

`A sex assault trial that hung on claims of a large penis was turned into a “cheap joke” by media coverage, a superior court judge said yesterday as she found the accused guilty.

Justice Margaret Eberhard said she was disturbed after receiving calls “from afar” and was ribbed numerous times over the trial in which a man claimed he could not be guilty of rape because his penis is too big. [..]

A 22-year-old student, who can’t be identified, claimed his penis is too big to insert into an average vagina without special preparation or it causes bleeding and scarring.

A urologist brought to court a plastic model that depicted the size of the member at a semi-relaxed state, which measured 8 1/2 inches long and 6 1/2 inches in girth.’

Followup to Penis size used as defence in trial.

`Editor’s Note: I scanned these images myself, at a university computing cluster, and I can assure you that it was an experience I’ll never forget.

Good thing I have nerves of steel.

But this wasn’t my idea.

The real star of this show is that mysterious woman known only as XY. This is her blood that you’re looking at. Examine the stains and get to know her a little better. Like reading tea leaves, perhaps you can divine something of XY’s future in these patterns. Or, after the manner of a Rorshach inkblot test, perhaps you can discover something of her psychological make-up — or your own.’

`It’s the sort of gift that Bill Gates Sr. wanted from his son.

[..] when Bill Gates Sr. turned 80 Wednesday, his son surprised him with this: an 80-year scholarship program for the University of Washington School of Law in the elder Gates’ name.

The length of the scholarship is a nod to Bill Gates Sr.’s age; the law school is his alma mater.

The cost: $33.3 million. The deal: Five students get a full-ride scholarship each year. In exchange, they commit to working seven years in public service after graduation — for instance, for a legal aid or advocacy agency, a nonprofit, as a public defender or prosecutor.’

This is the first time Bill Gates has done anything I don’t instantly find offensive in one way or another. :)

`A new survey of Internet use has found that more and more Americans are using the internet in the privacy of their bathrooms. [..]

he snapshot of how the Internet has changed American life, concluded that home wireless connections were allowing people to stay connected everywhere – even in the smallest room in the house. [..]

“Over half of those who used Wi-fi had used it in the bathroom,” said [a reasearcher], remarking that he believed some people in busy homes retreated there for some privacy.’

`Pere Lachaise cemetery in Paris has fenced off a famous tomb to prevent lewd acts being performed on a statue.

The effigy of 19th Century journalist known as Victor Noir has long been popular with women visitors.

This is partly due to his reputation as a romantic figure, and partly because of the effigy’s design.

Officials concerned about damage to the icon’s groin area have erected a fence around the grave, and a sign prohibiting indecent rubbing.’

`Although ancient Roman penis amulets are well known and contemporary Thai penis amulets come in numerous forms, charms or amulets that depict the anatomically-correct vulva are relatively uncommon. There are two reasons for this: First, since Neolithic times, the entire human female body (or at least the torso) has been used as a votary figure, with no one body part singled out for solitary emphasis. Second, the subtle folds of the female genitals are more difficult to render than are the bold cone-cylinder-and-spheres of the penis and testicles.’

`[..] The ongoing debate about whether big corporations are mismanaging knowledge workers is one we take very seriously, because those who don’t get it right will be gone. We’ve drawn on good ideas we’ve seen elsewhere and come up with a few of our own. What follows are seven key principles we use to make knowledge workers most effective. As in most technology companies, many of our employees are engineers, so we will focus on that particular group, but many of the policies apply to all sorts of knowledge workers.’

`At dawn on December 2nd 2005, Singapore hanged a citizen of Australia, despite a plea for clemency from the United Nations. Whilst Putfile is not a human rights campaigning organization, we believe that if a country must have the death penalty, there is no need for it be barbaric. It is enough of a punishment, and a deterrent, to take someone’s life in a painless manner, without having to be barbaric about it. Putfile prefers to not continue to provide our free uploading service to a country that executes prisoners by hanging, a method of execution which can take up to six minutes to painfully execute the victim.

For this reason, we are at this time terminating all service to users from Singapore. We shall be happy to restore service following any positive move from the government of Singapore towards abolition of hanging as an execution method.

Goodbye Singapore,

Putfile.’

People have left some hilarious reviews of the Fist Shaped Dildo on Amazon:

`This does not appear to be good for punching people in the face.’

`Warning, not for novices. Had to deduct one star because my buttocks slams shut every time I pull it out. On the plus side, it doubles as a chocolate ice cream cone. A fleet of seamen couldn’t get mine away from me!!!! But then again I’m not new to this game…’

And, because I was bored the other day and started fiddling around with Amazon Associates, you can also read the reviews [and maybe buy one for yourself!] via the half-built and fairly ugly shop thingy I made.

It’s all part of my plan to become a dildo salesmen.

`One of the most prominent landmarks in the East Village in Manhattan is a statue of a giant steel cube. The cube was built at Astor Place in 1968, and has stood there ever since. The cube can spin on its axis, which is pretty entertaining the first time, and requires a few people to get it moving. [..]

What an amazing place to pull off a prank!’

`Residents in Perth, Australia, saw the spectacular light show Saturday night. The meteor left a bright tail in its wake.

Karun Cowper, who was enjoying a meal with his family at Halls Head, caught the meteor on his video camera.’

Lucky it wasn’t one of those meteors that fall away from the Earth, because then they wouldn’t be able to film it. I can’t seem to find a copy of the video itself, but there are some still pictures attached to the story.

Update: I’ve found a link with the meteor video.

Update again: There’s a slightly longer meteor video at the BBC, with a bit more information.

`One man suffered serious head injuries and another man suffered a minor gunshot wound when they got into a fight with a pair of teenagers Thursday night on the city’s West Side. [..]

Salas then confronted two teens he suspected of stealing the tools with a pistol and fired a shot into the air.

After the teens persuaded Salas to put down his weapon and fight with his fists, one of them tried to pick up the gun, which accidentally went off, wounding Salas in the foot, police said.’

Something Awful recently did a thing where their forum readers could make anonymous confessions.

People are scary.

`The principle of ion generation is fiendishly simple. The electrical charge on an object is greatest at the sharpest point (that’s why electrostatic generators favour big curvy domes for charge retention), so if a high negative voltage is applied to a sharp needle then the charge at the tip is so high that ions are literally thrown off and then repelled by the negative field on the needle. This results in a physical draught and a slight hissing noise. In a very dark room you will also see a faint purple corona glow on the needle tips.

Most technical wisdom suggests that while negative ions make you feel good, positive ions can cause headaches and nausea. This is why a negative ion generator can improve the perceived atmosphere in an office that has an unaturally high positive ion balance.

But enough of the quackery… Here’s the data.’

Apparently the building sank into its basement rather than falling over sideways as planned. Now how are they gonna finish the job? I wouldn’t want to be the one who has to climb into that building and wire up another lot of explosives.

(1.7meg Quicktime)

Update: Much more about the dodgy demolition. Several videos, including a 43 minute live TV broadcast of the whole event, including the leadup.

I had trouble watching this. I don’t think I want to see ver.1 or ver.3. :)

see it here »

`Movie icon Tom Cruise is at the centre of a fresh medical row with experts expressing concern over his purchase of a sonogram machine to perform at-home scans on expectant fiancee Katie Holmes. [..]

But medical experts are warning it is dangerous for untrained Cruise and Holmes to be operating a complex piece of medical equipment such as an ultrasound machine at home. [..]

The ACR issued a similar warning, saying the famous couple could potentially harm their unborn baby by performing ultrasounds without a doctor’s supervision.’

With an excellent picture of the famous midget himself.

I figure, the baby is gonna be fucked up from all the Scientology nonsense anyways, so a bit of ultrasound damage is gonna be insignificant.

A friend of mine moved to Poland a few years back. The other day he had this tidbit to share:

`The average Polish person you meet is fine .. occasional weirdness but nothing to get too worried about .. but when they’re in groups you just have to be happy that Russia took all their nukes home.’

I thought it was amusing. That’s all. :)

`A jury convicted a man of murder for fatally shooting a 15-year-old boy who threw eggs at him.

The Marion Superior Court jury in Indiana deliberated for seven hours Thursday before finding Donald E. Ware guilty of killing Brandon Dunson-Taylor. [..]

Dunson-Taylor’s great uncle, Charles Russell, said the incident was a lesson for teens to avoid the actions that led to the shooting.

“A child’s prank can have consequences that no one could anticipate,” Russell said. [..]

Ware’s mother, Donna Ware, said her son was innocent.

“He’s done a lot of dumb things, but he would never kill anyone unless it was in self-defense,” she said.’

Black kids with eggs! They’re coming right for us!

`Before comparing the faces of pre and post 1966 pictures of Paul it would be a good idea to show you just how accurate this process is by comparing two pictures that we already know to be of the same person. First we will compare two photos of John Lennon, taken 11 years apart, and see how much a face changes in this amount of time.

Then we will compare two pictures of Paul’s girlfriend Jane Asher, one taken in the 60’s, the other taken in the 90’s.

Finally, we will compare two pictures that we know to be of the real Paul McCartney, one taken in 1963 and another from 1966 around the time that “Yesterday and Today” was released and see how well they match.’

Or, `Undeniable Proof that People are Crazy and Have Too Much Time On Their Hands’.