Thursday, November 8, 2007


Dyslexic Student Expelled Over Toy Gnu

‘A fourth grade Oakville student has been expelled from a Waterbury school for bringing a toy gnu onto the property. The action falls under the school district’s ‘zero tolerance’ policy, according to administrators. Officials believe the student, who is dyslexic, tried to intentionally break the policy.

“We’re convinced he intended to bring a toy gun.” said Meredith Simmons, Principal of Waterbury Elementary. “His reading disability may have confused him about what is prohibited in the policy, but we can’t take any chances. That’s why it’s called zero tolerance.”

The expulsion received full approval from the superintendent’s office. “We support Principal Simmons’ decision.” said Milton Decker, Assistant Superintendent. “The toy gnu may seem harmless, but we can’t ignore the underlying intent. I seriously doubt any of our students even know what a gnu is.”‘

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