Archive for June, 2006

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Friday, June 30, 2006

 

Drunk surgeon naked on letterbox

`The children’s doctor was sitting naked on an eastern suburbs letterbox masturbating, when the two women spotted him. [..]

Sanjay Warrier, 28, had been on a drunken night out with a group of doctors and returned to an address he had lived at two years before.

He said he remembers nothing of the incident. [..]

Magistrate Maloney dismissed the case.

“It’s an aberration, this offence, plain and simple. Nothing more, nothing less. He never intended to do what he did do.”

“Good luck” he said to Dr Warrier.’


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Wednesday, June 28, 2006

 

The Customer is always an Ass, Part 2

`”COVER YOUR MOUTH AND NOSE KIDS…..DONT BREATH THAT STUFF IN!!!”

After the server dropped the food off she walked back over to the screaming man so see if everything was alright. He was fuming:

“I THOUGHT THIS WAS THE NON SMOKING SECTION!!!”

The server explained that it wasnt smoke, but just butter burning in a hot skillet with mushrooms in it.

“OH SO YOU MEAN THAT MY CHILDREN ARE BREATHING IN AIRBORN MUSHROOM SPORES!?!?! AND NOW THEY WILL HAVE MUSHROOM GROING IN THEIR LUNGS??!?!?!!” ‘

followup to The Customer is always an Ass.


Is Microsoft about to release a Windows “kill switch”?

`I called Microsoft support to see if there is a hidden option to say, “yep, I’ve got updates turned to manual… it’s okay.” The rep said, “No and why wouldn’t you want to get the latest updates to Windows.”

I responded with the issues relating to WGA. He spent some time telling me that WGA was a good thing, etc. I reiterated that I have accepted all the updates except WGA and just want to review the updates before they’re installed on my machine.

He told me that “in the fall, having the latest WGA will become mandatory and if its not installed, Windows will give a 30 day warning and when the 30 days is up and WGA isn’t installed, Windows will stop working, so you might as well install WGA now.”‘


Woman gets severed finger in mail

`Texas officials are seeking a woman’s ex-boyfriend, after the mail brought her a severed finger and the message, “This is my last chance to touch you.”

Corpus Christi police say they’re not sure which finger it was or how it was cut off. But they say it “wasn’t mangled” and was apparently washed before it was mailed Friday.

The woman had filed for an emergency protective order from the man last week.’


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The 10 Weirdest Things Ever Sold On eBay

`Perhaps you’ve heard stories of people auctioning off strange items on eBay, like the homely kid who put his virginity up for bid or the bald guys who offer their own heads as advertising space. But those are nothing compared to some of the items that have made their way onto eBay’s digital auction block.

Here are ten of the weirdest things ever to appear on eBay. To qualify for this list, the item or items must have received at least one bid, proving the point that no matter what you have to sell, somewhere there is a buyer for it.’


8 Invaluable WordPress Plugins!

`[..] whilst WordPress in its default, out-of-the-box form can provide a good platform for your website, with a little tinkering you can increase the functionality of your site massively. And what’s the easiest way of tinkering? Plugins! Special files that you simply slot-in to your WordPress installation to get new features.’


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Transvestite gang pesters Magazine Street

‘Like an SOS flare, Lewis grabs her emergency phone list and starts calling.

“They’re coming,” she warns Eric Ogle a salesman at Vegas, a block down Magazine Street. Ogle, who was terrorized by the brazen crew two months earlier, alerts neighboring Winky’s where manager Kendra Bonga braces for the onslaught.

Soon every shop owner in the 2000 block of Magazine Street has been alerted.

Sarah Celino at Trashy Diva eyes the door, ready to flip the lock at the first sight of the ringleader’s pink jumpsuit and fluorescent red wig. [..]

“They’re fearless,” said Ogle. “Once they see something they like they won’t stop until they have it. They don’t care, they’ll go to jail. It’s really gotten bad. You know it’s ridiculous when everyone on the block knows who they are.”‘


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Sperm Tester Wanted

`Online sex toy retailer LoveHoney.co.uk is advertising what could be the most unusual job ever. The company is searching for a sexually active couple who will be prepared to test a new pill designed to change the taste of semen.

The pill, which is taken as a twice-a-day for 30 days, claims to mask the traditionally salty taste of male ejaculate with a refreshing apple-like flavour. Successful applicants will take the pill for 30 days and will use an online blog to provide a blow-by-blow account of how the taste of their partner’s sexual fluid changes.

“A payment is offered,” says LoveHoney test organiser Ali Carnegie, “But this is really a job that people should do for love rather than money.”‘


Pickle Phobia

‘Maury Povich helps a guest overcome her greatest fear by confronting her with pickles.’

(8.7meg Flash video)

see it here »


Army wives get phone death threats from Iraq

`Wives and family members of soldiers fighting in Iraq have received telephone calls, believed to include death threats, from insurgents, according to military documents seen by The Sunday Telegraph.

The “nuisance” calls have been made with increasing frequency over the past few weeks after insurgents managed to obtain home numbers from soldiers’ mobile telephones. [..]

It is understood that the threats range from claims that a husband or son is dead or will be killed fighting in Iraq, to verbal abuse. Many of those who have received calls say that they were made by people with a poor command of English or with a Middle Eastern accent.’


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Fake cops steal 100 kg of cocaine from Milan lab

`Police said the robbers had pretended to be carabinieri, Italian police, to gain access to the laboratory, then asked two medics to accompany them to the room where the cocaine was stored, wrapped in individual parcels.

There, they tied up the medics with plastic tape, snatched the cocaine parcels and left the laboratory, police said. [..]‘


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Tuesday, June 27, 2006

 

Guys Pranked While Relaxing in Sauna

‘I still dont get how these guys get away with these types of pranks in Japan. These guys screw with people while they are in a sauna after a day on the slopes skiing.’

Looks like it’s by the same people who made Public Toilet Prank.

(9meg Windows media)

see it here »


careers

Angry British Telecom Customer

‘A British Telcom customer goes absolutely insane on a telemarkter. Wow I know getting calls in the middle of dinner is annoying but I dont think I’ve ever gotten this mad.’

(860kB Windows media)

see it here »


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600 lbs. woman survives getting thrown through sunroof

`Thirty-seven-year-old Ruth Matthews told paramedics that another vehicle cut her off in traffic, and she took evasive action to avoid a crash. Her Isuzu Amigo rolled over and she was thrown through the sunroof and onto the roadway. Investigators say she was not wearing her seatbelt.

Paramedics initially tried to fly Matthews to Tampa General Hospital, but her weight, estimated at 600 pounds, made it impossible. Emergency crews were able to transport her to St. Joseph’s Hospital, where she is listed in stable condition.’


Pictures of TomKat’s Baby Didn’t Sell

`If like everyone else you’ve been wondering what happened to Suri Cruise and why we’ve never seen a picture of her, here is part of the answer: No one wanted to pay for her. [..]

The Cruise auction is said to have produced not more than a $3 million bid. At that point, the offer was rescinded. The mission was termed “impossible.” No further word was heard from the Cruise camp. [..]

And now that Suri is almost 3 months old, has her price gone up or down? The answer, says one of the mag’s experts, is down.’


Hacking Iraq

`Since the military provides just 6 to 12 computers for every 1,000 or so troops, time limits of 10 to 15 minutes per day are often enforced at Morale Welfare Recreation Cafés (the complicated name for military internet cafés). Anyone who sorts through spam, reads forwarded articles and jokes, then tries to respond to “real” email knows 15 minutes isn’t enough. Josh Hines, a soldier from Conway who recently returned from Iraq , confirmed that the Army lacks internet services and lamented the scarcity of entertainment options.

It should come as no surprise, then, that some enterprising military personnel have engineered an alternative. Hajjinets, the common term for troop-owned ISPs, have sprung to life on almost every base around Iraq. A typical Hajjinet is built and maintained by one or two soldiers and can provide nearly 24-hour internet access (until the region is stabilized and electrical lines can be installed, generators must occasionally be powered down for maintenance). Most Hajjinets are small, serving between 20 and 30 troops, but ISPs serving as many as 300 are known to exist.’


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Man Says He’s on Heroin to Avoid Jury Duty

`A man made a mockery of the justice system when he tried to get removed from a jury pool in a death penalty case by claiming he is a heroin addict and a killer, a judge said.

Benjamin Ratliffe, 21, of Columbus, was charged with contempt of court and obstruction of justice and ordered to spend a night jail.

Ratliffe filled out a questionnaire form for potential jurors and professed to having a “bad jonesin’ for heroin.” When asked if he had ever fired a weapon, he wrote, “Yes. I killed someone with it, of course. Right.”‘


Study links pesticides with Parkinson’s

`People with long-term, low-level exposure to pesticides have a 70 percent higher incidence of Parkinson’s disease than people who have not been exposed much to bug sprays, U.S. researchers reported on Monday.

Such workers include mostly farmers, ranchers and fishermen, the researchers report in the July issue of Annals of Neurology.

Their study supports previous research that suggests pesticides can be linked with Parkinson’s, which is caused by the destruction of key brain cells, the team at the Harvard School of Public Health said.

“The findings support the hypothesis that exposure to pesticides is a risk factor for Parkinson’s disease,” they wrote.’


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Monday, June 26, 2006

 

Cannibal study suggests human toll from mad-cow disease could be huge

`The ultimate death toll among humans from mad-cow disease could be massively under-estimated, according to an innovative study conducted among a cannibal tribe in Papua New Guinea. [..]

British doctors have hit on the idea of seeing whether people there fell sick long after the practice died out, the aim being to determine how long it takes for this BSE-like disease to incubate.

Their suspicions were confirmed, for they identified 11 people who were diagnosed with kuru between July 1996 to June 2004. [..]

As vCJD only surfaced as a disease little more than a decade ago, this relatively tiny toll has eased initial worries that tens of thousands of people could die, given that millions of people ate BSE-infected beef.’


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Sunday, June 25, 2006

 

Ok, I just need to verify one thing..

`Hekili_Manu: Ok. So I called my bank’s fraud dept about that hotels.com letter I got since I apparently used them twice with two different cards. I forgot completely that when I signed up you can assign your own security question online. [..]‘


Animal control workers discover house stuffed with rats

`Petaluma animal control workers expected to find a horde of cats when they knocked on the door of a 67-year-old man whose neighbor complained of a stench. Instead, they stumbled onto a scene straight out of the movie “Willard.”

About 1,000 pet rats — ranging from 3-year-old adults to little pink newborns — shared the one-room house with Roger Dier. [..]

He also shared the place with seven cats.’


Cameroon girls battle ‘breast ironing’

`A nationwide campaign is under way in Cameroon to discourage the widespread practice of “breast ironing”.

This involves pounding and massaging the developing breasts of young girls with hot objects to try to make them disappear.

Statistics show that 26% of Cameroonian girls at puberty undergo it, as many mothers believe it protects their daughters from the sexual advances of boys and men who think children are ripe for sex once their breasts begin to grow.’


conditions

Iraq Govt. Plan Calls for U.S. Withdrawal Timetable

`A timetable for withdrawal of occupation troops from Iraq. Amnesty for all insurgents who attacked U.S. and Iraqi military targets. Release of all security detainees from U.S. and Iraqi prisons. Compensation for victims of coalition military operations.

Those sound like the demands of some of the insurgents themselves, and in fact they are. But they’re also key clauses of a national reconciliation plan drafted by new Iraqi Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki, who will unveil it Sunday. The provisions will spark sharp debate in Iraq—but the fiercest opposition is likely to come from Washington, which has opposed any talk of timetables, or of amnesty for insurgents who have attacked American soldiers.’


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Human-to-Human Infection by Bird Flu Virus Is Confirmed

`An Indonesian who died after catching the A(H5N1) bird flu virus from his 10-year-old son represents the first confirmed case of human-to-human transmission of the disease, a World Health Organization investigation of an unusual family cluster has concluded, the agency said Friday.

The W.H.O. investigators also discovered that the virus had mutated slightly when the son had the disease, although not in any way that would allow the virus to pass more readily among people.’


careers

Saturday, June 24, 2006

 

Clowns Sabotage Nuke Missile

`On Tuesday morning, a retired Catholic priest and two veterans put on clown suits, busted into a nuclear missile launch facility, and began beating the silo cover with hammers, in an attempt to take the Minuteman III missile off-line. Seriously. [..]

The activists used bolt-cutters to get into the E-9 Minuteman II facility, located just northwest of the White Shield, North Dakota. “Using a sledgehammer and household hammers, they disabled the lock on the personnel entry hatch that provides access to the warhead and they hammered on the silo lid that covers the 300 kiloton nuclear warhead,” the group said in a statement. “The activists painted ‘It’s a sin to build a nuclear weapon’ on the face of the 110-ton hardened silo cover and the peace activists poured their blood on the missile lid.”

This was all done while wearing face paint, dunce caps, misfitting overalls, and bright yellow wigs.’


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The Winchester Mystery House

`This friend confirmed her suspicions by telling her that yes, she was being haunted–by the spirits of all those killed by the Winchester rifle over the years. The medium suggested that she move far away and build a house. The key, the medium added, would be to have the house in a perpetual state of construction. If Sarah were ever to complete the house, it would leave her vulnerable to the curses of the vengeful spirits.

Frightened and still grieving, Sarah Winchester believed every word. In 1884 she moved to what was then a rural area near San José, California. There, she purchased an eight-room farmhouse on more than 160 acres of land. Very shortly, a work crew began a perpetual construction project which would ultimately last for nearly forty years.’

There’s lots of images of the place at the Mystery House blog.


You’ve got (fe)male

`Fourteen staff at Britain’s driver and vehicle licensing agency have been sacked and 101 disciplined after they swapped so many pornographic emails that it clogged up the organisation’s mainframe computer. [..]

A woman worker, who did not want to be named, said: “Boredom is a major problem in this place. The work can be very tedious and people find ways of livening up their days.

“The early stuff was pretty innocent, a joke really. A very boring document would have a picture of a naked woman attached, for example.

“I suppose it was bound to get out of hand. [..]“‘


‘Thirst for knowledge’ may be opium craving

`Neuroscientists have proposed a simple explanation for the pleasure of grasping a new concept: The brain is getting its fix.

The “click” of comprehension triggers a biochemical cascade that rewards the brain with a shot of natural opium-like substances, said Irving Biederman of the University of Southern California. He presents his theory in an invited article in the latest issue of American Scientist.

“While you’re trying to understand a difficult theorem, it’s not fun,” said Biederman, professor of neuroscience in the USC College of Letters, Arts and Sciences.

“But once you get it, you just feel fabulous.”‘


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Man With Faulty Penile Implant Gets $400K

`A former handyman has won more than $400,000 in a lawsuit over a penile implant that gave him a 10-year erection.

Charles “Chick” Lennon, 68, received the steel and plastic implant in 1996, about two years before Viagra went on the market. The Dura-II is designed to allow impotent men to position the penis upward for sex, then lower it.

But Lennon could not position his penis downward. He said he could no longer hug people, ride a bike, swim or wear bathing trunks because of the pain and embarrassment. He has become a recluse and is uncomfortable being around his grandchildren, his lawyer said.’


Our grip on reality is slim, says UCL scientist

`The neurological basis for poor witness statements and hallucinations has been found by scientists at UCL (University College London). In over a fifth of cases, people wrongly remembered whether they actually witnessed an event or just imagined it, according to a paper published in NeuroImage this week.

Dr Jon Simons and Dr Paul Burgess led the study at the UCL Institute of Cognitive Neuroscience. Dr Burgess said: “In our tests volunteers either thought they had imagined words which they had actually been shown or said they had seen words which in fact they had just imagined – in over 20 per cent of cases. That is quite a lot of mistakes to be making, and shows how fallible our memory is – or perhaps, how slim our grip on reality is! [..]“‘


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