Archive for July, 2006

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Monday, July 31, 2006

 

Electrocution of the Phallus

Why?

(1.1meg Flash video)

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Wake Up!

It seems that if you ever go to Japan, it’s a good idea to stay awake the whole time you’re there. Unless you want something like this to happen to you. :)


Dude, check out my pecs

This guy likes his muscles and isn’t afraid to share.


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ER Closed, Hazmat Called After Birds Fall From Sky

`Pigeons falling from the sky prompted a hospital in Schenectady, N.Y., to close its emergency room and call in a hazardous materials team.

The birds had been poisoned by an exterminator.

Fire and police personnel noticed the dead and dying birds on the ground when they arrived at Ellis Hospital’s emergency room on an unrelated matter.

They closed off the ER for several hours out of fear that one of the falling birds would hit someone. A hazmat official said, “Birds were coming down like divebombers.”‘


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Angry German Kid With Subtitles

‘It took long enough but someone finally has taken the video of the least patient kid ever and added subtitles. Here it is the much long overdue translation.’

followup to Least Patient Kid Ever.

(15.7meg Windows media)

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Police nab smurfs for trampoline theft

`Two blue smurfs were left with red faces on Saturday night after they were arrested by police for stealing a trampoline.

Senior Sergeant Brian Benn told NZPA two drunk 19 year olds, “dressed as smurfs”, were seen carrying the trampoline along Richardson Street, Dunedin about 1am. [..]

“When they saw the police had noticed them they dropped the trampoline and took off.” [..]

“Two were located, but a third man got away,” he said.’


Celebrity Skin and Bodily Fluids

`For fecal and urine specimens, you will receive 2.0-3.0 cubic centimeters of specimen packaged in a hermetically-sealed transparent plastic cylinder (about the size of a film canister). The contents will be clearly visible through the cylinder. We do not recommend opening the cylinder after purchase, and we cannot be held liable for any injuries you sustain from engaging in this highly risky behavior.

For saliva, you will receive 0.5-1.0 cubic centimeters of specimen packaged in the same manner as the fecal and urine specimens. Some saliva samples may contain elements of toothpaste, mouthwash or food particles. We have no control over what the saliva may be mixed with.

Skin cells and bacteria come on a guaranteed non-corrosive and non-fogging durable glass slide for easy examination on any standard microscope.’


Gibson’s Anti-Semitic Tirade

`Once inside the car, a source directly connected with the case says Gibson began banging himself against the seat. The report says Gibson told the deputy, “You mother fuckerr. I’m going to fuck you.” The report also says “Gibson almost continually [sic] threatened me saying he ‘owns Malibu’ and will spend all of his money to ‘get even’ with me.”

The report says Gibson then launched into a barrage of anti-Semitic statements: “Fucking Jews… The Jews are responsible for all the wars in the world.” Gibson then asked the deputy, “Are you a Jew?”

The deputy became alarmed as Gibson’s tirade escalated, and called ahead for a sergeant to meet them when they arrived at the station. When they arrived, a sergeant began videotaping Gibson, who noticed the camera and then said, “What the fuck do you think you’re doing?”

A law enforcement source says Gibson then noticed another female sergeant and yelled, “What do you think you’re looking at, sugar tits?”‘

followup to Gibson sorry for conduct during DUI arrest.


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Sunday, July 30, 2006

 

Gibson sorry for conduct during DUI arrest

`Mel Gibson issued a lengthy statement Saturday apologizing for saying “despicable” things to deputies when he was arrested for investigation of driving under the influence of alcohol.

“I acted like a person completely out of control when I was arrested and said things that I do not believe to be true and which are despicable,” the actor and “The Passion of the Christ” director said without elaborating.

Neither Gibson’s publicist, Alan Nierob, nor the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Department would comment on what Gibson said when he was arrested early Friday on Pacific Coast Highway in Malibu.’

Followup to Mel Gibson arrested on suspicion of DUI.


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Funniest Mike Tyson moments

Mike Tyson is an idiot.

(21.4meg Windows media)

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Purported Animal Activist Forces English Fishing Village to End Annual Dead Eel Tossing Contest

`For more than 30 years, crowds have flocked to the small English fishing village of Lyme Regis to watch an annual tradition – two teams of fishermen standing on wooden platforms as human bowling pins, hurling a dead giant eel at each other. But the ritual was abruptly abandoned after an animal rights activist threatened to draw negative publicity to the latest tournament, organizers said Saturday.

The practice, known as conger cuddling, is the annual highlight in the small coastal town about 155 miles southwest of London. The object of the game is to knock the opposing team off the platform by swinging a 25-pound eel at them.’


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How to eat a watermelon


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Best Dell bug ever

`Chris here at work just found this cool bug on all our Dell Optiplex GX520. It was so cool in fact that we decided to capture a video and post it online.

The bug appears when you put your mobile phone close to the cd-rom unit of the dell and then recieve a sms/txt.

What happends is it goes into some sort of suspension mode from which you can’t bring it back without breaking power or holding down the power button for four seconds.’


Pro Wrestler Punches Reporter

‘Awesome clip of wrestler David Schultz a.k.a. Dr.D. This video is from 1984 when he slugged John Stossel from 20/20 two times after John asked him if wrestling was fake. John received between $280-450k in an undisclosed lawsuit from the WWF and David was kicked out of wrestling by Vince McMahon for life.’

(2.4meg Windows media)

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Drivers List Cars as Hearses to Save Fees

`Transport authorities promised swift action Friday after discovering some New Zealanders have listed their cars as hearses to cut their registration fees.

The scam came to light when a Christchurch woman told a local radio station she had paid just 58 New Zealand dollars ($36) to register her car, instead of the usual NZ$183 ($113), by registering it as a “noncommercial hearse” to carry dead animals.

The woman’s definition of carrying dead animals: taking frozen chickens home from the supermarket.’


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TV Japan Slapped In The Balls

‘Gotta give Japanese game show producers credit they are single handedly the most sadistic and hilarious people ever. On this game show contestants have to recite a tongue twister under a certain amount of time or they get slapped in the balls. Brilliant!’

(10.8meg Windows media)

see it here »


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Woman sought in Magic Cheese scam

`Police in Chile are asking Paris to extradite a French woman after a massive pyramid-selling scam in which thousands of people were conned.

People were persuaded to buy a powder which they could allegedly turn into “Magic Cheese”, said to make skin look younger and to be highly valuable.

The powder, called Yo Flex and costing up to $500 (270), turned out to be an almost-worthless food supplement.’


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US arms sales net ‘billions’

`The Bush administration spelled out plans overnight to sell $US4.6 billion ($6 billion) of arms to moderate Arab states, including battle tanks worth as much as $US2.9 billion ($3.78 billion) to protect critical Saudi infrastructure.

The announcement came two weeks after the administration said it would sell Israel its latest supply of JP-8 aviation fuel valued at up to $US210 million ($273.7 million) to help Israeli warplanes “keep peace and security in the region.”

The United States also rushed a delivery of precision-guided bombs requested by Israel after launching its airstrikes against Hezbollah fighters in Lebanon 17 days ago, The New York Times reported last week.’


Driver dies after shot in groin

`A man has died after accidentally shooting himself in the groin while driving his car, causing him to smash into a power pole in Melbourne.

Police say it appears the 38-year-old man was carrying a loaded firearm, which accidentally discharged.’


The Storm

`On the great oceans of the world, the height of the storm waves usually does not exceed 8 to 10 meters, which actually is quite impressive. Image a “wall” of water at the same height as a two story house coming crashing towards you with an incredible speed! it can be quite awesome to experience!

But what happens if the waves are NOT just 10 meters tall, but more likely 20 meters??? Or more???’


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Windows Vista demo goes awry

Microsoft demonstrating the voice recognition software in Windows Vista, or trying to atleast. :)

(3.8meg Flash video)

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‘Competing’ serial killers terrify Phoenix

`The attacks started last August, but it has taken several months for the police to realise that there seem to be two separate assailants on the loose. [..]

Most local people believe the two killers are involved in a deadly game of one-upmanship. When one strikes, the other follows.

“The sooner they are caught, the better it is for this whole city,” says Justin Schneider, wearing a red beret as he patrols the park. The 21-year-old is a Guardian Angel – one of 30 volunteers now trying to restore calm on the streets of Phoenix. [..]

“You can’t have two guys on the loose, seeing who can kill the most innocent people,” Mr Schneider says.’


Ballmark Cards… Make Tonight a Ballmark Moment

`Our goal: Create high quality, handmade cards and then dip our balls on them. [..]

We lovingly hand-dip our scrotums in high quality paint and then place them in an aesthetically pleasing way on each card. We encourage you to click on the Products picture or tab above in order to see our full line of cards. All our cards are for sale for $4.95 and will be made and delivered in less than a week. Have a super day!’


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Saturday, July 29, 2006

 

WTF flavor is this?


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You Are A Pirate

`Do what you want, ’cause a pirate is free.’


O’Neill sorry for butting horse

`Jockey Paul O’Neill has apologised for the headbutt on a horse which could see him punished by the Horseracing Regulatory Authority.

He will be asked to explain his actions by the HRA next week after the incident at Stratford was caught by TV cameras.

O’Neill said: “I would like to say to the public that I’m very sorry they had to see such a thing. I’ve never done it before and it will never happen again.”‘

with video of the headbutt.


Catholics face crisis over retired nuns

`With tens of thousands of U.S. nuns over age 70, the Roman Catholic Church is facing a massive financial shortfall for the care of retirees in religious orders a gap that over the long term dwarfs costs from the clergy abuse crisis.

Though billions of dollars have been salted away, there still remains an unfunded future liability of $8.7 billion for current nuns, priests and brothers in religious orders. The financial hole is projected by a consulting firm to exceed $20 billion by 2023.’


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Cake thrower risks 15 years

`A student who threw a cake at Finance Minister Kristin Halvorsen last October has been charged with committing a crime against the Norwegian Constitution.

The cake attack occurred outside of the Finance Ministry on Halvorsen’s first day in office, and the new minister was hit squarely in the back of the head.

Afterwards the student came forward in newspaper VG and said he had thrown the pastry in order to stimulate debate about whether Norway was well served by having a minister of finance from the Socialist Left Party.

The question of what the 24-year-old student would be charged with has been left up to the Director of Public Prosecutions, and the final decision carries a maximum penalty of 15 years in prison.’


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Mel Gibson arrested on suspicion of DUI

`Actor and director Mel Gibson was arrested Friday in Malibu, California, on suspicion of driving under the influence, according to the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Office.

Gibson, 50, was pulled over early Friday while driving on the Pacific Coast Highway, said sheriff’s spokesman Steve Whitmore. Officers on patrol reported Gibson was driving at an “excessively fast speed,” he said.

Gibson was taken into custody and posted $5,000 bond for his release, Whitmore said.’


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Tiger Attack !!!

You think you’re safe from tigers sitting on top of an elephant?

Maybe you should think again. :)

(1.8meg Windows media)

see it here »