Archive for May, 2005

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Saturday, May 21, 2005

 

The 50 Worst Hairstyles of All-Time

`It is said that hair makes the man, and certainly women go to amazing lengths to find a style that will at once enhance their looks and set them apart from other women. Sometimes the pressure and lengths traveled lead to styles and cuts that are just plain terrible. From the old standbys of ugliness like, The Mullet and Comb-Over to new additions to the bad hair lexicon like, The Career Terminator and The Gangsta Pimp- they are all here. We hope you enjoy our list of the 50 Worst Hairstyles of All-Time. ‘


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Britain faces big chill as ocean current slows

`Climate change researchers have detected the first signs of a slowdown in the Gulf Stream — the mighty ocean current that keeps Britain and Europe from freezing.

They have found that one of the “engines” driving the Gulf Stream — the sinking of supercooled water in the Greenland Sea — has weakened to less than a quarter of its former strength. [..]

Such a change could have a severe impact on Britain, which lies on the same latitude as Siberia and ought to be much colder. The Gulf Stream transports 27,000 times more heat to British shores than all the nation’s power supplies could provide, warming Britain by 5-8C.’


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Friday, May 20, 2005

 

Erectile Dysfunction, Viagra, and God’s Will

`Throughout the Bible, having a hard and lasting erection is frequently equated with righteousness and Godliness. Potency and procreative ability and prowess are often equated with God’s blessings: “His seed shall be mighty upon earth: the generation of the upright shall be blessed.” (Psalms 112:2) In the Old Testament, David was one of God’s most favored servants, and here the Lord declares how he has blessed him with a firm manhood: “For thy steadfast love was established forever, thy faithfulness is firm as the heavens. I pledged my word to my servant, David, saying, Everyone descending from you is guaranteed life; I’ll make your rule as solid and lasting as rock.” (Psalms 89:2-4) As we can see, an erection is not only a gift from God, but also a means of glorifying Him. Later in the same Psalm, the Lord explains how David’s erection is actually praising Him: “My faithfulness and my steadfast love shall be with him, and in my name shall his horn be exalted.” (Psalms 89:24)’


Lake disappears, baffling villagers

`Officials in Nizhegorodskaya region, on the Volga river east of Moscow, said water in the lake might have been sucked down into an underground water-course or cave system, but some villagers had more sinister explanations.

“I am thinking, well, America has finally got to us,” said one old woman, as she sat on the ground outside her house.’


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Everything You Ever Wanted To Know About Anal Piercing But Were Afraid To Ask

`A speculum was inserted into my arsehole, and expanded. This then allowed the sphincter to be opened so that the needle could be inserted for the piercing. As I was used to relaxing my sphincter muscle, the process of expanding the speculum was a not unpleasant experience, and I experienced no problems. The placement needed to be discussed, and we decided that it would go through the outer sphincter, as this would help to prevent “leakage” once the ring was inserted. I decided that I wanted it in the area by the base of my spine. There was no specific reason why I wanted it there, as it can be placed in either location.’

..with pictures.


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Toddler rescued from toy vending machine

`”He climbed up the chute and into the bin,” says mom Danielle Manges. “He was playing with all the toys and hanging from the bar like a monkey.”

Danielle laughed at first but when Wal-Mart employees couldn’t find a key to the machine, she called the fire department.

Anthony Coleman of the Elkhart Fire Department said, “I expected his hand to be caught in the machine but it was his entire body in the machine. It was a toy machine and he was actually in there and enjoying himself.”’


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Filmmaker Claims Jim Morrison Is Alive In Oregon

`Rodeo photographer Gerald Pitts insists Morrison didn’t die in July of 1971 and he has current photographs and film footage of the rocker to prove it.

Pitts, who met Morrison in 1998, says the rocker staged his death because of a French conspiracy to kill him, Janis Joplin and Jimi Hendrix with narcotics because they were all Vietnam war protestors.

These days, Morrison isn’t the drug user he once was, although Pitts says when he goes over to Jim’s house he’ll “maybe have an occasional beer.”

Now Pitts claims that Morrison is announcing he’s alive, in part, to promote his recent agreement to star in a rodeo shoot-out movie based on events that actually happened to Pitts.’


Italy in recession but porn industry booming

`Italy may be in recession but the pornography industry in the traditionally Roman Catholic country is booming and growing more high-tech savvy by the day, a new study co-sponsored by the Vatican showed Thursday. [..]

Italians spent an estimated 247 million euros on pay TV porn in 2004, up 63 million euros from the previous year, as more satellite operators offered clients subscription packages.

The figures by Eurispes contrasted starkly with the general economic mood in Italy, whose economy has slipped into recession after two consecutive quarters of contraction.’


The STAR WARS is Satan’s TOOL

`Billions of dollars has been made off the series of movies called The Star Wars that is beloved by millions. Many big fans of this space opera, do not know that the fantasy epic they enjoy is not a simple entertainment, but Satan’s Battleground for their very souls!

In this “Final Episode” of the Star Wars, EVIL triumphs using the Force – a greater force they claim than God! This is a Dangerous LIE! This is no mindless entertainment, but an attempt by DEMONS to distract you from your real 75 year mission on planet Earth, to give yourself to Jesus! Do not trust a Yodah puppet from Satan’s dream factory, trust in the Word of the Bible!’

May the force of Jesus be with you.


Officer fires gun in school parking lot

`Riding with a friend in a white Mazda 6 sedan, Eric Clifton, a former Palo Verde student, zipped through the parking lot looking for girls, he said.

When the teens pulled to the front of the school, an officer approached and told them to stop, but Clifton’s friend ignored the order and drove away, he said. [..]

At one point, an officer threw his bicycle in front of the car, which dragged the bike about 40 feet before getting stuck on a speed bump in the middle of the aisle, witnesses said.

Clifton said his friend put the car in reverse to try to free the bicycle, and that’s when one of the officers fired. [..]

[A student] said she had to dodge the speeding car, yet she questioned the officer’s decision to fire in the bustling parking lot.

“I definitely don’t think it was necessary to shoot at the car when there were that many students around,” she said.’


Rescued sharks die in truck

`Wildlife officers seized 47 endangered sharks destined for diners in five star hotels in eastern India but most of them died when taken to court as evidence, an official said today.

The officers seized the sharks when they boarded a trawler in the Bay of Bengal near the Sunderban forest area and arrested 14 of the crew including the captain.

The sharks were alive when the wildlife officers seized them, but many of them died after they were loaded into a truck and taken to a court in Calcutta to be produced as evidence, said Atanu Raha, director of Sunderban biosphere.’

Funny that, sharks die when you take them out of water. That’s good conservation.


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Snake venom habituation in heroin addiction

`The present cases are reported here to make the readers aware of this type of habituation, which is still being practised in big cities. However, both the patients did not show any withdrawal symptoms, indicating that they were not addicted. As the snake bite was not taken daily, mostly because of high cost and likely lethality, addiction to it could not develop. However one patient showed tolerance to its effect. It is noteworthy that both the patients preferred it to heroin. We feel that it is possible to collect the snake venom from such places with the help of local community social workers.’


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Cocaine switched for talcum powder

`Police sniffer dogs in Victoria have lost their ability to trace drugs after a batch of cocaine used to train them was apparently switched for talcum powder.

The switch was discovered during routine tests in the past fortnight when the dogs ignored bundles of cocaine, but showed unusual prowess in tracking baby powder.

Three separate corruption investigations have been launched to find out what happened to cocaine supplied by the Australian Federal Police to train the sniffer dogs.’


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Hapland 2


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Thursday, May 19, 2005

 

Light Brigade

This game kept crashing Mozilla on me, but it works fine in IE.

I think it’s probably my Mozilla that’s at fault tho.


Elvis Presley: Nazi

`Almost 28 years after his death, fans of the King of Rock, Elvis Presley, can now see their icon in a radically different light; that as a Nazi.

The legend is seen wearing a Nazi cap and giving a Nazi salute in some pictures taken from a grainy half-hour home cine film.’

Hopefully this will turn up on the net at some point. If anyone finds it, leave a comment with the URL.

[Or mail me, if I have my mail.php script thingy done by then. :)]


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FBI: Grenade at Bush Rally Was Live

`An agent for the U.S. FBI said Wednesday that a grenade thrown in the crowd during last week’s speech by U.S. President George W. Bush was capable of exploding.

The statement by agent Bryan Paarmann contradicted initial reports by Georgian officials that the grenade was not in condition to explode and that it had been found on the ground rather than thrown.’


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Kinky shopper KOed by vibrating knickers

`According to UK tabloid the Sun, a 33-year-old Welsh housewife ended up in hospital after wearing Ann Summers vibrating Passion Pants to her local Asda supermarket in Swansea.

Unfortunately, she became “so aroused by the 2˝-inch vibrating bullet inside that she fainted” then “fell against shelves and banged her head”. This prompted the attendance of the paramedics who “found the black leatherette panties still buzzing”. Having disabled the orgasmatronic underwear, they then whisked the senseless shopper to hospital where she made a complete recovery.’


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What European Tribes Think About One Another

Apprently Germans think Belgians are smelly pederasts and the Spanish think the Dutch are offensively tall.

Or it could all just be made up. [shrug] Who knows. 🙂


Microsoft Patents Email Addresses

`The present invention is directed at a system and process for allowing a user to treat email addresses as objects. This allows easy manipulation of the email addresses, such as allowing them to be added to a contact list, copied to the computer’s clipboard, or double-clicked to open the related contact information for that email address sender. [..]’

I reckon I should try and patent Bill Gates’ arsehole, then make him give me a million dollars every time he uses it to take a shit.

Either I’ll become very rich or he’ll start carrying around a colostomy bag.


Secret Worlds: The Universe Within

`View the Milky Way at 10 million light years from the Earth. Then move through space towards the Earth in successive orders of magnitude until you reach a tall oak tree just outside the buildings of the National High Magnetic Field Laboratory in Tallahassee, Florida. After that, begin to move from the actual size of a leaf into a microscopic world that reveals leaf cell walls, the cell nucleus, chromatin, DNA and finally, into the subatomic universe of electrons and protons.’


Galloway Delivers Scathing Remarks

Some British MP at a senate enquiry in the US talking about Iraq. It’s very cool, he lays into them and pretty much tells them they’re all cunts.

(5.7meg Flash video)

see it here »


Broadband enters Nether-world

`Nethercomm, a California-based Broadband provider, claimed on its website to have pioneered a technology to deliver TV, phone and internet services through natural Gas pipelines.

The wireless, last-mile, method — dubbed Broadband-in-Gas (BiG) technology — would provide “limitless bandwidth”, the company said.’


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Under-age drinkers are under the thumb

Someone finally noticed and removed it but, according to ZGeek, there was originally a picture attached to the article.

You can access it from the ZGeek forum.


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Mad Physics

`Welcome to Mad Physics Dot Com, your source for all things science. Whether you’re a student, teacher, or just a fan of the science this site will teach you and ignite your imagination. We provide all sorts of labs and demonstrations to answer all of your unanswered questions. [..]

In coming up with experiments for the site we came up with certain criteria: the experiment should be cool, easy to set up, and cheap. We tried to stick with that set-up, but still some of our experiments are VERY dangerous. That is why we recommend that you take extreme precautions and always work with a partner. Remember, we do not take any responsibility for damages or injuries caused by these experiments!’


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Wednesday, May 18, 2005

 

Leeroy!

Amusing video from WoW (I think).

Reminds me of a friend of mine. Every time we tried to start a new Diablo multiplayer game the first thing he would do is race down and let the Butcher out. Invariably, soon after the game started there’d be a cry of “Aah, fuck! Dave’s the the Butcher out again. Help me! Help! Oh, don’t worry, I’m dead”, followed by much laughter from Dave himself and moans from everyone else.

Those were the days. 🙂

(6.6meg Flash video)

see it here »


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Anti-Gay Christian Phone Company

‘It was in late December 2004 when New York-based comedian Eugene Mirman first received a phone-call from a nonprofit organization called “Faith, Family and Freedom,” asking if he opposed gay marriage and then offering to switch his long-distance service to a “Christian-based telephone carrier” identified as United American Technologies out of Oklahoma. [..]

After the call reaches a person they are prompted to press “1” if they oppose gay marriage. A holding message says “Please do not hang up … This information will describe how the ACLU and gays are getting gay marriage in every state.” The operator then enters the conversation:

Operator: Did you press 1 to oppose same sex marriages?
Mr. Mirman: Oh, I pressed it, yes.
Operator: Okay, that’s great to hear. And are you against same sex marriages?
Mr. Mirman: Well, I want to destroy it, yes.
Operator: Okay. That’s great to hear… –
Mr. Mirman: Like the fist of God we will smash them!
Operator: Exactly.’

mp3s of the recorded conversations. Worth a listen.


Japanese What?

There’s just no explanation for this.

(4.2meg .wmv)


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Super Water Kills Bugs Dead

`Developed by Oculus Innovative Sciences in Petaluma, the super-oxygenated water is claimed to be as effective a disinfectant as chlorine bleach, but is harmless to people, animals and plants. If accidentally ingested by a child, the likely impact is a bad case of clean teeth. [..]

According to Hoji Alimi, founder and president of Oculus, the ion-hungry water creates an osmotic potential that ruptures the cell walls of single-celled organisms, and out leaks the cell’s cytoplasm. Because multicellular organisms — people, animals, plants — are tightly bound, the water is prevented from surrounding the cells, and there is no negative impact.’


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The Camel Toe of Doom

It’s awful. You’ve been warned.

Certified 100% unsafe for work.


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