Archive for April, 2006

Saturday, April 29, 2006


WordPress Inline Ajax Comment Plugin

I’ve been fiddling around with various WordPress features and plugins whilst migrating my blog over from Blogger. I installed Peter Kashou’s Inline Ajax Comments plugin which uses some funky AJAX code to allow expansion and contraction of comments on the main pages of the blog. However, I was a bit annoyed that I couldn’t customize the text of the link that did the expansion/contraction.

It would have been a simple task just to go into the source code and modify the strings directly, but I didn’t like the idea of having to do that every time I decided to change the text in the future. So, I decided to modify the code so that it allows configuration of these strings in the plugins options menu on the WordPress administration page.

The plugin functions exactly as Peter’s plugin did, except for the added configuration options, and by default it will use the same strings for expansion/contraction as the original plugin. The plugin is also called via the functions ajax_comments_link() and ajax_comments_div(), just like in the original.

I figured I’d post it here incase anyone else might want to make use of it. You can download it here.


Friday, April 28, 2006


zoomed in food


Some spam from my mailbox

Subject: This stuff is not really expensive as before…

Hi Bro!

I am ready to kill myself and eat my dog, if medicine prices here
( are bad.

Look, the site and call me 1-800 if its wrong..

My dog and I are still alive 🙂


Wednesday, April 26, 2006


Gary Coleman is very disappointed in you

Least safe for work video ever

I always find it amusing that no matter how many times I think to myself “I’ll never find anything more offensive than what I’ve just posted” there’s _always_ something worse to find, floating somewhere around on the interwebs.

Still, this time I _really_ think this might be the most awful thing ever.

I don’t recommend anyone watch this video. Especially not at work.

(3.9meg Flash video)

see it here »

Tuesday, April 25, 2006


Not a lot of updates lately..

I haven’t been updating much lately ’cause I’m in the middle of moving my blog from Blogger to a locally hosted WordPress database. So, if there’s not enough news posted on the site to keep you interested at the moment, check back in a week or two and things should be back to normal.

SQL is kinda interesting, btw. Parsing and formatting strings so the SQL database likes them is far less interesting. [sigh] But I think I’m almost done with that bit of it.

The site has been breaking every now and then whilst I’m fucking about with the PHP backend, but there’s no need for alarm [unless you like alarm, in which case, go right ahead]. If you visit over the next little while and see an SQL or PHP error, just give it five minutes and refresh the page and it should all be good again.

And now, because I’m drunk, here’s an SQL query some of you might like:

INSERT INTO yo_momma (state, value, value_size, value_unit) VALUES (‘hot for it’, ‘my cock’, ’12’, ‘inches’);


The birds are like, dying..

Someone’s just taking the piss, but it’s pretty funny none the less.

Full story at Something Awful.

(2.3meg Windows media)


Gangsta rapper of Kabul puts peace before guns ‘n’ girls

`With his fur-lined Puffa jacket, silver pendant chain, bandana, neatly trimmed goatee beard and combat trousers, DJ Besho looks like any other gangsta rapper.

In his music video DJ Besho, meaning DJ Diamond, stands on the bonnet of a Humvee, rapping. It is there that the similarities with the gangsta rappers of Los Angeles and New York end. There are no girls in bikinis gyrating in the background and no references to guns, drugs and prostitutes.

This is Afghanistan and five years after the fall of the Taleban the country’s first rapper is still constrained by a tight social code. “We have to take it step by step. It will be a while before I can introduce ‘booty shaking’ to Afghanistan,” said the 28-year-old, referring to a type of dancing where scantily clad girls wiggle their behinds.’


Police hunt Leone ‘killer chimps’

`Police in Sierra Leone are on the hunt for a group of chimpanzees, who escaped from their wildlife sanctuary after a fatal attack on construction workers.

Armed reinforcements are combing the area after a Sierra Leonean died and two Americans were seriously injured. [..]

A worker at Tacugama told the BBC that some 24 chimpanzees had escaped, and six had already returned.

Armed police arrived after the attack and fired shots which caused panic among local people.’

Monday, April 24, 2006


The Basic Laws of Human Stupidity

`The first basic law of human stupidity asserts without ambiguity that:

Always and inevitably everyone underestimates the number of stupid individuals in circulation. [..]

At first, the statement sounds trivial, vague and horribly ungenerous. Closer scrutiny will however reveal its realistic veracity. No matter how high are one’s estimates of human stupidity, one is repeatedly and recurrently startled by the fact that:

a) people whom one had once judged rational and intelligent turn out to be unashamedly stupid.

b) day after day, with unceasing monotony, one is harassed in one’s activities by stupid individuals who appear suddenly and unexpectedly in the most inconvenient places and at the most improbable moments.’


Sunday, April 23, 2006


The Worlds Oldest Gang Bang

`Crystal, 19 years old, has agreed to have sex with 50 people, both male and female, over the age of 60 to make “The Worlds Oldest Gang Bang”.

If you would like to be involved in this exciting project, and are over the age of 60. CLICK HERE to let Rob know your interested.

DO NOT SEND PHOTOS WITH YOUR EMAIL! All that is required from you at this time is an email with the following info… Name, Age, Phone Number.

All types are being sought for this project. So long as you are over the age of 60.

Women with strap-on’s are encouraged to apply.’

Hawaii Gov. OKs Giving Placenta to Parents

`Gov. Linda Lingle signed a bill Friday allowing hospitals to release the placenta, the organ that connects mother and child in the womb, to a birth mother.

The legislation came after several Hawaiian couples found they would not be allowed to take the placenta — known as iewe in Hawaiian — from the hospital to perform a traditional ceremony.

In Hawaiian belief, the iewe is considered a part of the child. Ceremonies in the islands include burying the iewe under a tree, so that the growth of the tree can be used to better understand psychological and spiritual changes in the child.’

Penny costs more than a cent to make

`What happens if a penny is worth more than one cent?

That is an issue the U.S. Mint could soon face if the price of metals keeps rising. Already it costs the mint well more than a cent to make a penny.

This week the cost of the metals in a penny rose above 0.8 cents, more than twice the value of last fall. Because the government spends at least another six-tenths of a cent — above and beyond the cost of the metal — to make each penny, it will lose nearly half a cent on each new one it mints.

The real problem could come if metals prices rise so high that it would be economical to melt down pennies for the metals they contain.’


Christian And The Stripper

Just keep on drinking..

(7meg Quicktime)


Towards the magnetic fridge

`Researchers at the University of Cambridge have discovered a material that gives a whole new complexion to the term ‘fridge magnet’. When this alloy is placed in a magnetic field, it gets colder. Karl Sandeman and his co-workers think that their material – a blend of cobalt, manganese, silicon and germanium – could help to usher in a new type of refrigerator that is up to 40 percent more energy-efficient than conventional models.

Given how much energy is consumed by domestic and industrial refrigeration, that could have a significant environmental payoff. Sandeman describes the work at the Institute of Physics Condensed Matter and Materials Physics conference at the University of Exeter, on Friday 21 April.’


9/11 film actor refused visa for US premiere

`The Iraqi actor who plays the lead hijacker in the new 9/11 film United 93 has been refused a visa to the United States to attend the premiere, it was reported today.

Lewis Alsamari was told this week by the US embassy in London that he is unlikely to be allowed to enter the US for the first public screening next Tuesday in New York, where it is due to open the Tribeca Film Festival, a newspaper said.’

Naked carpenter: I wanted to stay clean

`A carpenter who keeps his clothes clean by working in the nude was arrested after a client returned home early and found him building bookcases in the buff.

Percy Honniball, 50, was charged with misdemeanor indecent exposure this week for the October incident.

He told officers he stripped before crawling under the client’s house to do electrical work because he didn’t want to soil his clothes, police said.

Honniball said Thursday that working in the nude gave him a better range of motion and that a skilled craftsman can work clothing — and injury — free.’

Cock In A Blender

This seems unnecessarily dangerous, if you ask me.

(1.3meg Flash video)

see it here »


New penicillin found in wallaby milk

`Scientists have discovered a bacteria-fighting compound 100 times more effective than penicillin – in wallaby milk.

Researchers found the highly-potent compound, tagged AGG01, was active against a wide variety of fungi and bacteria including antibiotic-resistant superbugs.

Research team leader Dr Ben Cocks said the discovery could have a profound impact on both human and animal health.

“This compound has the potential to be commercially synthesised and may prove vital in the war against increasingly resistant human and animal diseases,” Dr Cocks said.’


Dancing Cat


Saturday, April 22, 2006


The Spirit of Truth

‘I come in the name of Jesus.. Repeat after me, bitch.. I come in the name of Jesus, by the power of the Holy Spirit, God Almighty. You know, ruler of heaven and earth and every goddamn thing in between. You understand me now?’

Also, he ain’t followin’ whitey’s rules.

(19.6meg Flash video)

see it here »

Ghetto Bungee Jumping In Yard

‘Ghetto Bungee jumping in the front yard. We’ve all been there before, when theres nothing to do on a Saturday so you improvise your own fun. This game is the negative result of Saturday boredom.’

(845kB Windows media)

see it here »


Homeland Security grants spent on clowns and gyms

`Fire departments are using Homeland Security grants to buy gym equipment, sponsor puppet and clown shows, and turn first responders into fitness trainers.

The spending choices are allowable under the guidelines of the Assistance to Firefighters grant administered by the Homeland Security Department, which has awarded nearly 250 grants since February totaling more than $25 million out of the current spending pot of $545 million.

Homeland Security Secretary Michael Chertoff vowed to redirect grant spending based on risk of a terrorist attack, but Congress has ignored his pleas, federal officials say.

“The administration has not supported the funding for physical fitness equipment as part of the fire grant program,” says Marc Short, Homeland Security spokesman. “Physical fitness is an individual responsibility.”

The Bush administration has specifically asked Congress not to allow funding for physical fitness, but the members who run Congress’ appropriation committees keep inserting the language into the department’s budget, officials say.’

Cruise Baby Name Blunder

`Language experts are amazed Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes have named their baby daughter Suri – because there is no record of the name meaning “Princess” in Hebrew. According to Hebrew linguists, Suri has only two meanings – one is a person from Syria and the other “go away” when addressed to a female. Hebrew expert Johnathan Went says, “I think it’s fair to say they have made a mistake here. There are variations of the way the Hebrew name for princess is spelt but I have never seen it this way.” Suri can also be translated into a Hindi boy’s name, and it also means “pointy nose” in some Indian dialects and “pickpocket” in Japanese.’

A universal constant on the move

`It seems that nothing stays the same: not even the ‘constants’ of physics. An experiment suggests that the mass ratio of two fundamental subatomic particles has decreased over the past 12 billion years, for no apparent reason.

The startling finding comes from a team of scientists who have calculated exactly how much heavier a proton is than an electron. For most purposes, it is about 1,836 times heavier. But dig down a few decimal places and the team claims that this value has changed over time.

The researchers admit that they are only about 99.7% sure of their result, which physicists reckon is a little better than ‘evidence for’ but not nearly an ‘observation of’ the effect. If confirmed, however, the discovery could rewrite our understanding of the forces that make our Universe tick.’


Disk Array to the test

`At a distance of about 40 feet, a .308-caliber bullet traveling 2,900 feet per second barely slows down as it punches through a piece of metal. But what happens when you put a refrigerator-size piece of computer hardware in its path?

At a high-tech ballistics center managed by National Technical Systems (NTS) in Camden, Arkansas, HP engineers are about to find out. On one side of the control room: a custom-made mounted rifle barrel that delivers bullets to a target with pinpoint accuracy. On the other side: an HP StorageWorks XP12000 Disk Array that’s operating under a full production load and streaming high-quality videos to nearby monitors. An NTS ballistics expert in the control room is ready to electronically fire the weapon. The fate of the hardware will be determined in a fraction of a second.’


Friday, April 21, 2006


Retiree flushes thousands of German marks down toilet

`A retiree in northern Germany flushed some 30,000 marks (about $21,500 Cdn) down the toilet, believing the old bank notes were worthless, police said.

Officials were alerted by a blocked pipe in the northern city of Kiel. A cleaning company employee extracted soggy bundles of bank notes, but more money got away as the water started flowing again.

Investigators then discovered that the retiree had reported a blocked pipe at his house the same day. They visited the “slightly bewildered” man at his apartment and he confirmed that he had flushed the money away, a police statement issued late Wednesday said.’


Rape claim

`A man who claims he mistakenly had sex with “the wrong woman” after entering a dark bedroom at the home of a Sydney magazine editor was yesterday committed to stand trial for rape.

Paul John Chappell, 31, was invited back to the editor’s Bondi flat after they met during a night out.

The pair went to bed and Chappell later got up to use the bathroom.

But Chappell claims he mistakenly returned to the wrong bedroom, where the editor’s 23-year-old flatmate was asleep.

He got into bed with the flatmate and initiated sex, allegedly believing she was the other woman.

The flatmate participated because she thought it was her own boyfriend who had come to bed after falling asleep in the loungeroom.’

Prison Visitor Allegedly Uses Vagina To Smuggle Live Grenade

`A Salvadoran woman is in some trouble after she allegedly tried to smuggle into the country’s main prison a military grenade and marijuana hidden in her vagina.

The cylinder was about 10 inches long and 4 inches wide. Officials didn’t say what prompted them to check Lidia Alvarado, 44, but authorities have raised the security level at jails across the country, fearing inmates may be planning something.

Alvarado was visiting two inmates serving 25 and 30 years when she was arrested. She now faces drug and weapons charges.

Police who inspected the M-67 grenade said it was in working condition.’

Thursday, April 20, 2006


Men hallucinate after eating fish

`Two men have suffered terrifying visual and auditory hallucinations after eating a popular local seafish in Mediterranean restaurants.

According to a clinical study on the patients, which is due to be published in the journal Clinical Toxicology, the men started seeing and hearing things after contracting a rare form of hallucinogenic poisoning from the Salema fish they were dining on.

The species is a popular food fish and is not normally hallucinogenic.

Ichthyoallyeinotoxism, or hallucinogenic fish poisoning, is caused by eating the heads or body parts of certain species of herbivorous fish and has previously only been recorded from the Indo Pacific.

The effects of eating ichthyoallyeinotoxic fishes, such as certain mullet, goatfish, tangs, damsels and rabbitfish, are believed to be similar to LSD, and may include vivid and terrifying auditory and visual hallucinations. This has given rise to the collective common name for ichthyoallyeinotoxic fishes of “dream fish”.’